25 Days of Christmas Troubles
by Kita the Spaz
Summary: Originally written for the challenge on LJ. Stuck in the village during the Holidays, can Kakashi find a new reason to enjoy the holidays? It sure doesn't seem so when Tsunade assigns him to help Iruka. Rather cracky, but fun! Mature! Complete.
1. I Won't Be Home For Christmas

Written for the 25 days of Christmas challenge on the kakairu comm on LiveJournal!

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or associated properties. I'm making no money off of this. Life would be easier if I was!

Title: I Won't Be Home for Christmas  
Prompt: Bah, humbug  
Author: Kita_the_spaz  
Rating: Probably won't go over PG-13 but if any of them do, I'll leave a warning! This one PG.

* * *

Every year it would be the same. At the end of the midwinter festival, he would go to the Hokage and demand a mission that would keep him out of the village until after the New Year. Every year, without fail.

Save this year. The Godaime Hokage, Tsunade looked distinctly unimpressed, her arms folded over her generous bosom. "No."

"Hokage-sama…" When all else fails, go with politeness.

From the look on her face, it wasn't going to work any better than his demands. "Not until you can give me one good reason why I should let you hide away from the world until the holidays are over."

He knew he was scowling, knew it could be seen in the little bit of his face left exposed, but his face refused to come to heel and obey his mental order to be an emotionless blank. "The village needs me out there."

"Bzzt. Wrong answer. Try again." Tsunade settled herself more comfortably in her chair. "Most of the surrounding countries are hemmed in with snowstorms that don't look to let up for weeks yet. I have plenty of shinobi out on patrol and the only mission that has crossed my desk this week that hasn't been for ANBU is a D-rank inside the village."

"So give me one of the ANBU ones."

"Wrong again. You are retired ANBU. Nothing I have is serious enough to justify calling you back to duty." Tsunade chuckled, and there was something in the sound that set his teeth on edge. "Keep trying. I'm waiting to see what all you can come up with."

Time to break out the big guns, then. "Tsunade-sama, please." He injected every bit of pleading he could manage into his voice and gave her the most woebegone look he could manage.

Tsunade just shook her head. "Save that look for someone who didn't know your sensei. He was better at it."

His outraged look was met with a snort.

Tsunade regarded him in silence, the gaze stretching out so long that he wanted to squirm uncomfortably, like a child facing punishment.

"Look, brat," she said at last. "I know all about how much you hate the holidays, but this year, I won't allow it. You've been hiding from everyone and anyone since you were just a child. It's unhealthy and it has to stop. So this year, you _are_ staying in the village and you will participate in the festivities. And who knows, you might just enjoy yourself after all."

He gave her a thoroughly disgruntled look before his face went back to neutral. "You can order me to stay in the village, but I will not participate in anything."

She just chuckled and her smile turned evil. "Oh, no?"

"No."

He watched uncomprehendingly as she shuffled papers for a moment and called out to Shizune, who was waiting patiently outside the office.

"Yes, Tsunade-sama?" Her aide asked, sticking her head in the door.

"Where did you happen to put those papers from yesterday? You know the ones."

Shizune brightened. "They're in the desk, Tsunade-sama. Top drawer."

Tsunade opened the drawer and smiled. "Perfect. Shizune, come here for a moment." She handed the papers to the younger woman. "Take these and write them up in the proper format… as mission parameters. Quickly, please."

"But…" Shizune blinked, though her smile never faltered.

"I'll pay the fee. Take it out of my personal funds. Hurry now." Tsunade's smile became frightening while Shizune's widened and became more genuine.

Shizune hurried out of the room and left them alone.

He looked at the Hokage's smile and wondered if it was too late to escape. While he was contemplating how quickly he could make it out the window, Shizune returned with a neatly written mission scroll that she handed over to Tsunade.

Tsunade glanced over it quickly, smiled and affixed her signature and seal to it. The pleased sparkle in her hazel eyes was a warning a wiser man would have heeded. She was grinning as she handed over the scroll. "I have a mission for you."

He accepted the roll of parchment and read over the details. "Is this a joke, Tsunade-sama?" he asked flatly.

"Nope." She smirked. "It was a legitimate request for aid, but until now, I didn't have anyone to take it. You just volunteered yourself. Congratulations, it's your mission now. You'll aide your client in whatever he needs during the holidays. Who knows? Maybe you might find something to celebrate this year."

She rose and rumpled his hair affectionately. "Have fun, brat."

Kakashi looked down at the scroll in his hands, convinced that the world at large hated him.


	2. The First Hello

Title:The First Hello  
Prompt: Working through the holidays  
Author: kita_the_spaz  
Rating: Still PG

* * *

Iruka tapped politely on the Hokage's door, schooling his features to display none of his irritation. He had a thousand and one things still to do and this summons to attend the Hokage was not helping him get them done any faster. He managed a polite smile as Shizune opened the door. "Shizune-san? The Hokage sent for me?"

Tsunade's voice rang out from behind the petite, dark-haired woman. "Got it in one. Get in here, Iruka-sensei."

Iruka stepped into the office, smiling pleasantly at Tsunade. The smile froze when he caught sight of the copy-nin sitting sullenly in front of her desk. Kakashi was radiating anger and a very large portion of it was directed squarely at him. The door closing behind him sounded very much like a death knell.

"I have a solution to the problem you brought to me last week, Iruka-sensei." Tsunade said cheerfully – like there wasn't a lethal ninja practically glowing with deadly intent sitting in front of her desk.

Iruka's mood instantly lightened. "You've found some help then?"

Tsunade's smile was impish and a shard of unease made itself known. "Yep. Meet your personal assistant for the holidays. I believe you know Hatake Kakashi?"

His stomach was suddenly a leaden lump and all Iruka could do was gape at his Hokage.

"P-pardon?" He managed through numb lips.

Tsunade's voice turned chiding. "Now, now, sensei. You heard me. Kakashi-san is going to be your assistant until the New Years. Didn't you ask me for help?"

Iruka tried to ignore the thought that Kakashi looked like he'd sooner ram a kunai through Iruka's throat than pick up a single paper to help him. "I did. However…" He straightened his spine, feeling that single grayish eye glaring murderously at him. "I wasn't expecting an elite Jounin. Isn't helping me with preparations for the holiday celebrations a little below his skill level?"

Tsunade tipped her head, hazel eyes bright with mischief. "Do you doubt me, Iruka-sensei? I specifically chose Kakashi here to help you."

Iruka swallowed and shook his head. "No. I just…" He trailed off helplessly with the distinct feeling that Tsunade was plotting his death. "As my Hokage commands."

He bowed and dared to glance at the jounin. Kakashi was motionless, but his chakra still flared in sharp, angry spikes. Iruka thought a little crazily that he might get impaled if he got too close.

Kakashi stood up, his movements jerky and controlled. His bow to Tsunade was perfunctory and he made no effort to disguise the anger that practically exuded from every pore. Iruka had to force himself not to flinch as that stormy gray eye landed on him.

Kakashi opened the door and gestured for Iruka to precede him. It took every ounce of courage and iron control of the instincts that were screaming that he was showing his undefended back to an enemy for Iruka to walk out that door.

As soon as they were out of the tower Iruka turned to the jounin. "While you are obviously no more happy about this than I am, please stop. Your killing rage is scaring people." Iruka waved a hand to indicate several people hurrying away, all in the hunched position of a prey animal desperately trying not to be noticed by a predator.

As quickly as that, the rage was gone. Iruka swallowed, his throat dry. "Thank you, Kakashi-sensei."

Kakashi snorted and pulled out his infamous orange book.

Iruka sighed, more confident now that the jounin wasn't radiating fury. "So… what the hell did you do?"

"Hnn?" The single exposed eye regarded him lazily over the edge of that damned book.

"To royally piss Tsunade-sama off? I really can't see her assigning an elite to assist at the academy in preparation for the holidays, unless you managed to annoy her beyond reason." Iruka watched him, lips curved in an amused smile.

"Nothing…"

"Your lies didn't even work on your genin team." Iruka rolled his eyes. "What makes you think I'll buy them?"

Kakashi just stared at him… long enough for the chuunin to start feeling distinctly uncomfortable. Then he turned his regard back to his book. "So what exactly am I supposed to be helping you with?"

Iruka grinned, shaking off his uneasiness. "Well, this is the last week before the academy students are let out for winter break. There's a lot to do. The production is still only half ready and it's really hard to keep the student's minds on what they are doing. Plus we have to finish the decorating and the planning of both parties…"

"Both?"

Iruka nodded, scratching at the base of his ponytail as he got into the narrative. "Of course. There's the party in the daytime for all the underage students and later in the evening there's one for the jounin and chuunin academy instructors. The party the kids all challenge each other to sneak into without being caught…"

Kakashi snorted under his breath as he followed the younger sensei's rapid pace. He'd graduated and gone on his first mission before ever seeing any of these celebrations. He'd spent his first winter after graduation out in the field training with his sensei and Morino Ibiki, who had just been promoted to special jounin when he graduated. "Sounds like a lot of wasted effort for little gain."

"Boy, whoever was passing out the holiday spirit bypassed you completely, didn't they?"

Kakashi stared at the chuunin, as Iruka led him into the Academy. It still smelled the same as it had when he was a child, chalk and finger paint, paper and dust. Iruka opened a door and Kakashi stared with dawning horror at the room filled to the brim with pre-genin terrorists.

He knew then that it wasn't the world that hated him, it was the whole damned universe.


	3. Oh, Holy Hell

Title: Oh, Holy Hell  
Prompt: Hyper Children  
Author: kita_the_spaz  
Rating: PG

* * *

Thirty pre-genins regarded Kakashi as dubiously (if not moreso) as he was regarding them. Kakashi resisted the urge to flinch as one of them _(ugh… was that snot dangling from his nose?) _shuffled forward.

"Who're you?" He demanded.

"Udon." Iruka chided. "This is Kakashi-sensei. He's going to be helping us finish up in time for Christmas break, so be nice." He grinned. "Don't break him."

Kakashi whipped around to shoot the chuunin an alarmed look, only to find he had vanished. "I'll be back in a few minutes!" His voice floated merrily back to the jounin. "Keep them busy until I get back."

Kakashi slowly turned to face the children. This was _not_ good.

"How come your hair is the color of Gran's? Are you old?" The rapid-fire questions came from a girl with pigtails that looked like they'd been dipped in paint.

"Why's it stand up like that?" Another asked.

_Open wide the gates and let slip the hounds of hell, _Kakashi thought grimly._ Or at least the questions of hell._

"Your hiate'ate is crooked. You should fix it cause Iruka-sensei says 'reduced viv-vis-visibility' can kill you!"

"Why d'you wear a mask?"

"Are you ugly?"

"Do ya got scars?"

"Do you have buck-teeth?"

"Ninja's don't have buck-teeth, moron!"

"Well, than you can't ever be a ninja, can you?"

"Well, they don't let retards be ninja either, so I guess you can't be either!"

"Stupid!"

"Momma says you're a pre-vert. Are you? And what's a pre-vert?" Asked another of the children, unperturbed by the screeching catfight.

"Pervert! Say it right! Ebisu-baka-sensei is a pervert." Kakashi recognized the voice of the Sandaime's grandson, Konahamaru. This was just getting better all the time…

"He's not like Ebisu-san." A grinning girl informed Konahamaru. "He can't be. Ebisu-san is just creepy. Kakashi-sensei is _mysterious._"

"How can he be mysterious when he don't say nothin'?" Another of the hellions asked.

"He's the strong, silent type!" The girl screeched back. "He's also tall and handsome."

"How can he be handsome if you can't see his face, Kikiyo?"

"He is! I can just tell!"

"Iruka-sensei is handsome. He's just a creepy guy in a mask. And he smells like dogs!"

Dogs?! Desperate for a distraction, Kakashi grinned and used a senbon to nick his thumb. He flashed through the seals of his summoning jutsu and called the whole pack to him. Smoke swirled and suddenly eight dogs were staring dubiously at the horde of pre-genin. For a long moment, neither side moved. Guruko whined softly; nervously.

The stalemate was broken. "Dogs!" one of the children shrieked, and en masse, the horde descended on the poor, unsuspecting ninken. Pakkun yelped as he was mobbed. Wisely, Uuhei took shelter under Iruka's desk. Kakashi wanted to join her.


	4. Decimate the Halls

Title: Decimate the Halls  
Prompt: Christmas Songs  
Author: kita_the_spaz  
Rating: PG

* * *

Iruka walked back into the classroom, burdened with some of the supplies they would be using to decorate the school and had to stop and stare for a long moment.

Kakashi was perched on his desk, looking distinctly like he was about three seconds from bolting. There were seven ninken being molested by grabby eight-year-olds with an eighth hiding under the desk. The only one he knew on sight was Pakkun, but it was clear that Kakashi had summoned his whole pack to keep the kids occupied.

From the looks Kakashi was getting from the dogs, he was about to get mutinied against.

Iruka dropped his supplies and clapped sharply. "Alright everyone, back to your seats!"

There was a groaned protest from the pre-genin, but looks of relief from ninken. "Did you all behave for Kakashi-sensei?"

"Yes, Iruka-sensei!" The class chorused as the scrambled back to their seats. Every single one of them wearing an innocent look that wasn't fooling Iruka in the slightest.

Iruka stifled a laugh as he looked at the slightly panicked look visible on the exposed portion of the jounin's face. He could practically read the man's thoughts. _If this is them being good and behaving, what the hell happens when they take it in their minds to act up?_

The ninken looked horribly mauled. The huge black one had tinsel dangling from his ears and poor Pakkun's brown fur was mussed and rumpled. The gold and white one had fingerprints all over his sunglasses and a stressed look on his canine face.

Iruka chuckled. "Thank you for showing my class your summons, but I think you can send them back home now."

Kakashi's eye went wide and Iruka had to fight hard to stifle a laugh. Did the children traumatize him so much that he felt safer with the dogs there to protect him?

The dogs shot Iruka grateful glances as they, without word from their master, began to disappear. The red female under his desk slipped out and stood on her hind legs to lick Iruka's cheek before vanishing. The last to leave was Pakkun, who gave his master a long, meaningful look. "You owe us big-time for that." He intoned gravely, before vanishing in a poof of smoke and displaced air.

Iruka had to stifle a chuckle. "Alright, form up in your groups and come to the front of the classroom, one at a time, to get your supplies. You all remember what to do, right? No, Mariko-chan, that doesn't mean put glue in Gin's hair! What are you doing?"

Mariko looked up innocently, big blue eyes wide and guileless. "I just wanted to see if it would stand up like Kakashi-sensei's. It's almost the right color!"

"You know better. Gin-kun, go to the teacher's lounge. Noriko-sensei should be in there. Tell her what happened and she'll help you get the glue out. Hurry, before it dries." Deftly, Iruka handed the boy a pass and shooed him out the door.

"Mariko-chan, no more glue for you. You can take Gin's spot twisting the streamers together." He cut the student off before she could even begin to protest. "And you do know how to do it. Don't give me that look, you know perfectly well it's all your fault for putting glue in his hair."

Iruka clapped his hands again. "Form up in groups. Konohamaru, if I see that rubber snake again, I'm using it to string you up from the rafters. And leave Hanabi alone. Group one, come up here to get your supplies."

Kakashi watched in reluctant amazement as Iruka deftly managed the terro—students, breaking them up into groups of four and five, and passing out supplies. He directed them with as much talent as any seasoned leader. "Groups two and four, meet up with Umeko-sensei in the classroom next door. She's your team leader, so listen to her. She'll be telling you where to put up decorations. Groups one and five, you meet Tatsuya-sensei in the library. You go straight there. I'll know if you don't and you don't want that, do you?" As one, every little head shook no.

"Groups three and six, you're with Kakashi-sensei and I." Kakashi winced. He really wanted nothing to do with this. Really.

After the little hellions had been dispersed and they had stopped by the lounge to pick up Gin, whose white-blonde hair was wet and slicked down to his skull, they proceeded to the front of the academy. Kakashi was put to work cutting lengths of crepe paper or holding one end of a streamer as a giggling child twisted it just so. Unfortunately, he seemed to be partnered all too often with the one who had been making calf-eyes at him. She giggled and kept _winking_ at him!

Iruka ignored his plight, directing his little monsters like a pro. "Sakiko-chan, up over the railing! If you let it hang down it'll droop and hit the ground! Akihiro-kun, if you don't stop trying to tie Daichi-kun up in those ribbons, I'm going to use them to hang you from the academy roof by your ears!"

Kakashi had to give Iruka that, he was very inventive with his threats. He catalogued several of them away for future use.

He was startled by an unearthly sound. He turned to see the pig-tailed girl tipping her head back. The most awful sound was coming out of her mouth. He flinched as the girl who was twisting the streamers began to make the same horrible noise. A boy joined in.

Then to his absolute horror, Iruka joined in. Kakashi dropped the streamer he was holding and clapped his hand over his ears.

"_Deck the halls with boughs of holly…"_

Yep, it was confirmed. He was in hell…


	5. Grilling Over an Open Fire

Title: Grilling Over an Open Fire  
Author: Kita_the_spaz  
Prompt: Burned Dinners  
Rating: PG

* * *

Iruka was still laughing when they left the school after sending the last of the little hellions home for the evening.

"It's not that funny," Kakashi grumbled around the armful of things Iruka had him carrying.

"I'm sorry, but it was. If you could have seen the look on your own face when Moegi started singing…" Iruka snickered.

"That wasn't singing, that was strangling a cat and then stomping on it." Kakashi said sourly.

Iruka laughed heartily. "You have no musical appreciation, Kakashi-san."

"That was about as far from music as you can get and still be on the same planet."

Iruka smirked. "Come on. I'll buy you dinner to make up for subjecting you to that."

"Not ramen."

"Does everyone think that's the only bloody thing I eat because I treat Naruto to it all the time?" Iruka asked in amusement.

Kakashi snorted.

To his surprise, Iruka curled up the corner of his mouth in a smile that effectively killed the image of an innocent teacher, stomped it flat, mauled it some more and set it on fire for good measure. "I have wide and varied tastes…"

Kakashi felt his mouth drop open at the sultry tone in Iruka's voice.

"In food." Iruka laughed again and Kakashi felt the corners of his own mouth turn up in response. He'd known from the first moment he'd met Naruto that the Iruka-sensei the boy was so devoted to had to be something special. He'd never known he had such an interesting sense of humor though.

Iruka grinned at him and tapped his arm. "How 'bout over there?" He pointed at a restaurant where you were served plates of meat and vegetables to cook over the small charcoal brazier set into the center of each table.

Kakashi nodded and followed Iruka into the small restaurant. They were seated in a booth that the owners obviously reserved for their shinobi patrons, one that had a clear line of sight to the door and all possible attack routes. Iruka made small talk as they were served. Kakashi debated how best to eat without showing his face. Iruka swiftly grilled several of his pieces before pointedly looking elsewhere as he ate. He didn't even look back when he heard the sizzle of the meat hitting the metal grille.

Kakashi sighed as he took a bite, while more of his food cooked. "Thank you." He could have been thanking Iruka for the food or for him respecting his privacy. Kakashi wasn't sure.

Iruka smiled, though he kept his attention on his own plate. "You're welcome."

Kakashi flipped the pieces of meat still on the grill. "So how else are you planning on torturing me?"

Iruka snorted. "I'm not planning on torturing you, Kakashi-san. That might have been Tsunade-sama's intentions, but I assure you it's not mine. I wasn't aware that leaving you to watch over a roomful of pre-genin would be so traumatizing that you would have to call your dogs to rescue you."

Kakashi shot him a sharp glare, but the chuunin was still looking down at his plate.

Iruka chuckled. "I've been asking Tsunade-sama for help for a while now. Every year we have a celebration of the holidays at the school, and unfortunately, we're chronically shorthanded. It's a bit of a send-off sort of thing. The teachers going "We don't have to see you again until after the New Years," and the kids because they get to be out of school. A welcome break for all, but as short-staffed as we are, it's been a real hassle the past couple of years." Iruka laughed quietly. "I do appreciate the help, even if I don't know what you did to piss the Hokage off enough to make her assign you to help. I'm usually stuck with the job of coordinating the whole damned thing."

He picked up a piece of grilled onion and pretended to study it in a way that made Kakashi sure that it was so he didn't accidently glance up at the copy-nin's face. "If it's any consolation, I won't keep you past this weekend, in spite of Tsunade-sama assigning you to me until the New Years." Iruka said. "After that, you can take a few days off and observe the holidays as you wish."

"I don't celebrate the holidays." Kakashi didn't even realize how bitter his own voice sounded until he saw the instinctive tensing of Iruka's shoulders. Iruka's fingers tightened around his chopsticks, like he was anticipating an attack.

"I'm sorry…" Kakashi sighed. "But I'm usually on a mission over the holidays, not stuck here in the village."

He almost didn't hear Iruka's next question, it was spoken so softly that the soft chatter of the restaurant and the quiet sizzle of the meat nearly drowned it out. "Why do you hate the holidays so much, Kakashi-san?"

"I don't hate them." He saw Iruka's reflexive twitch to look up at his face and sighed, tugging his mask back into place. "You can look now, Iruka-sensei."

Iruka glanced up and turned to face him. "Don't lie to me. I teach pre-genin. I know when someone is lying."

Kakashi sighed and looked down at his hands, toying idly with his chopsticks. "I don't remember a holiday where I wanted to be a part of the celebration. When I was four, my mother died right around Christmas. The year after was the year my father went on that damned mission. The one that cost so many lives and every bit of respect he had ever earned. He had no desire to celebrate the holidays after that. When he died two years later, I had already become chuunin and had no time or interest in celebrating the holidays."

Iruka looked up at him, his brown eyes dark with shared pain. "I felt the same the year my parents died, but I remembered that the holidays are a good time for remembering what we have lost over the year and looking forward to a new one that might be better."

"Hnn."

"Kakashi-san?"

"Mmm?"

"Naruto and I celebrate the holiday together since we have no one else. Would you like to join us this year?"

Kakashi looked up, startled.

"Would you?"

He looked down at his hands again. He was silent for so long that Iruka finally called his name again.

"Kakashi-san, we'd like to have you come over. Naruto is trying to talk Sasuke into coming too. We're all alone. But together we don't have to be quite as alone."

Kakashi said nothing.

"Kakashi-san?"

Finally, in a faint whisper, Kakashi murmured his acceptance.

"Kakashi-san?"

"Hnn?" He still didn't look up, a little afraid of the soft look he'd seen momentarily on Iruka's tanned face.

"Kakashi-san?"

"What?"

"Your meat is burning."


	6. Violent Fright

A/N: Next chapter! ~falls down panting~ And we're back to the crack! Don't ask what Iruka did, please! Only know that it was Eeeeeeeviiiil.... and leave it at that!

Title: Violent Fright  
Prompt: Holiday Specials  
Author: kita_the_spaz  
Rating: PG-13  
Thanks to DarkAuroran and Micah_n10 for all that support and email tag! I needed it! Thanks everybody for the reviews. I love them so much!

* * *

After dinner, Iruka grinned at Kakashi. "Meet me at the academy tomorrow at seven. And be on time. You wander down the road of life and I'll let the students use you for kunai practice."

Kakashi snorted.

"Don't make me have to come get you, Kakashi. You won't like what will happen if I have to fetch you." There was a malicious sparkle in Iruka's eyes. "If you won't take my word for it, just ask Genma what happened. He might not want to talk about it, but you're bound to get an interesting reaction if you mention Holiday specials to him."

Iruka flashed him a grin and was gone with admirable speed, springing across the street to a staircase and from there to the roof of one of the buildings. Kakashi pulled out his book and wandered back toward the mission room, his thoughts more on the chuunin and his words than those printed on the page in front of him.

Even if he really had no business being there, the mission room was always an interesting place, and maybe Genma would be on shift tonight. Iruka's taunt was like a niggling itch and he found himself wanting to know what it was all about.

It was slow in the mission room, only a few Genin teams turning in reports and the odd jounin amusing themselves by trying to peg one of the desk workers with wadded up bits of paper without waking Tsunade, who was drowsing in her seat. Kotetsu was managing to ward off or catch the projectiles, but the female chuunin next to him wasn't able to manage to keep all of them away. Idly, Kakashi snagged one out of the air right before it hit her face and pegged Genma in the head with it.

The special jounin swiveled his head around, senbon clenched between his teeth. He spotted Kakashi and his frown transformed into his trademark smirk. "Yo. No use throwing things at me. Tsunade-sama's given strict orders not to give you a mission until after the New Year. Besides, aren't you babysitting brats at the academy? D-rank?"

Kakashi scowled behind his mask. "It's classified as a B-rank. But it should be a S-class. Those kids are worse than some of the names in the Bingo Book."

Genma smirked. "Aw… Issums big bad copy-nin afwaid of the mean widdle kiddies?"

Kakashi resisted the urge to shove that senbon through Genma's airway. "Actually, I hear tell it's their teacher who is the one I really have to watch out for. Maybe you know him… Iruka-sensei. Bout so tall, brown hair, scar across his nose."

Kakashi watched in interest as Genma paled. He could almost hear the thin metal needle creaking as the special jounin clenched his teeth. "Y-yeah. I know him."

"What can you tell me about him?"

"Iruka-sensei's a really nice guy. Mean hand with anything you can throw though, which is how he can keep the lines in the mission room moving. Nailed Ibiki with a rubber stamp once. For three day's Ibiki had the word 'incomplete' on one of his cheeks." Genma's jovial tone was strained. "And he's the one who had Gai doing that ridiculous little stunt where he tried to swim the lake last winter, _after_ it had iced over."

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. He'd been away on a mission during the event in question and had always wondered who had beaten the green-clad jounin at his own game.

He glanced down at Genma, noticing the senbon-chewing jounin had developed a distinct twitch.

"Anything else?"

"Nope." It was said too fast and Genma's twitch worsened.

"I heard the oddest little rumor from one of his kids."

"Oh…?" Genma's voice had gone up a register.

"He said something about the holiday special that was on a while back…"

Kakashi had never seen a ninja move so fast. "Oh, _fuck no_!" Genma ricocheted off of Ibiki, rebounded off the wall, dodged left to avoid Shino and made it down the stairs before his senbon had even managed to hit the ground.

Awake now, Tsunade raised an eyebrow as Kakashi bent to pick up the fallen needle. "While I confess that was very entertaining, brat, what the hell was that all about?"

Kakashi stuck the needle through a pile of paper work awaiting approval on the now abandoned desk, as mystified as she was. "Damned if I know. All I did was mention a holiday special."

"Shit. You didn't?!" Raidou had just entered the room with a stack of blank scrolls. He dumped them on the desk and glared daggers at Kakashi. "Dammit, it's gonna take me a _week_ to talk him down now!"

Kakashi shrugged. "What?"

Raidou's look was pitying. "You don't want to know. Trust me, you really don't. Never piss Iruka-sensei off." He turned and Headed down the stairs after the vanished Genma.

For a long moment, there was silence in the mission's room. Finally Ibiki broke it, clearing his throat and shuffling forward to hand a sheaf of papers to the Hokage. He glanced at Kakashi. "Iruka-sensei is a good man, but it's wise not to run afoul of his temper. He can give my people night sweats."

If just the mere _mention_ of a crappy show could do that to Genma…

Kakashi resolved that he would be on time the next morning. Hell, he might even be early.


	7. Santa Claus is Coming to School

Short chapter this time but fun!

Title: Santa Claus is Coming to School  
Prompt: Green  
Author: Kita_the_spaz  
Rating: PG

* * *

In spite of his threats, Iruka was surprised to see Kakashi waiting for him outside the academy. The copy-nin did shoot him some odd looks over his ever-present book, but didn't say a word as Iruka led him to the teacher's lounge. There were several teachers there and Iruka cheerfully greeted them all, politely introducing Kakashi, who barely looked up from his book to nod at them.

But as they left the lounge, Iruka deftly snatched the book from Kakashi's hands. "You can have this back after the children's party today. I'm not going to have you reading this in front of pre-genin." Iruka smirked at him and tucked the book into a pocket on the inside lining of his vest.

"Besides, there are much better authors in this genre than Jiraiya. You should branch out more." He said cheerfully over his shoulder as he opened the door to the class room, leaving Kakashi to stare at him in open-mouthed shock.

Iruka hid a smirk at the look in the jounin's visible eye. _Maybe that will teach Kakashi not to underestimate me again._

Iruka grinned and turned to the copy ninja. "We have less than an hour before the kids get here. I'm supposed to help coordinate the food. Can you do me a favor?"

Iruka searched out the right key and tossed it to the jounin. "This is for the storage room up on the third floor. All the kid's presents… except the ones from their secret Santa's… are stored there. They are already wrapped and labeled, so all you have to do is take them to the person playing Santa. He'll be waiting for you in the dojo, where he's getting ready."

He bodily turned Kakashi around and gave him a push out the door. "At least you don't have to be here for roll call. Scat."

Kakashi scowled as he lugged the huge bag of presents down two flights of stairs, but at least he didn't have to deal with those children. _Yet,_ a portion of his mind sourly reminded him. He found the dojo and hauled the bag inside. He stopped dead.

Why in _the hell_ was he playing Santa Claus? _Why? _ If there was ever proof that the universe at large hated him, it was standing there in its skivvies.

Kakashi turned away with a sick feeling in his stomach and the wish to rip his own eye right out of his head.

_And worse, why was even his underwear green?_


	8. We Wish You a Merry Christmas Party

Title: We Wish you a Merry Christmas Party  
Prompt: Parties  
Author: Kita_the_spaz  
Rating: PG

* * *

After the trauma of that morning, (_never want to see Gai that undressed ever again) _Kakashi found that dealing with the horde of children wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. He had returned to the classroom to help Iruka herd the excited children to the largest of the indoor training courts, which had been converted into a tinsel-covered atrocity, meant to inspire Christmas cheer in all viewers.

In Kakashi's opinion, it failed miserably.

The children were already hyped up and eager and the copy-nin winced as he took in the table covered with many sugar-coated sweets and a large bowl filled with punch that looked to consist of food coloring and sugar.

Iruka caught his dubious look and grinned cheerfully. "Look at it this way," he said, as the group of pre-genin squealed and headed for the table at a dead run, intent on their assault on the shrine to sugar. "We only have to cope with them for the next hour and a half. Then we get to send their little over-sugared butts back home for their parents to deal with. A sweet revenge for all those endless parent-teacher meetings."

The slightly sadistic look he wore concerned Kakashi a bit. Iruka merely smiled as he waded through the crowd and fetched two cups of the punch. He made his way back and handed one to Kakashi, who looked at it very uncertainly. Iruka grinned at him and pulled a very small flask out of one of the pockets of his flack vest. He tipped a tiny measure into both of their cups. "We have to stay in command of our faculties, but it doesn't hurt to have a little medicine for the headache." His sweeping arm motion took in the whole room. He grinned at Kakashi. "Just be glad we're not on the clean-up committee, this time around."

Kakashi was a little surprised by the chuunin-sensei. The man had been startling and confusing him at every turn, it seemed. Naruto had been right when he had described Iruka all that time ago. He was a bundle of conflictions and contradictions wrapped in tan skin and a welcoming smile.

They and the other teachers corralled into chaperoning the party ran herd on the pre-genin until, with a very loud and youthfully exuberant "HO HO HO!" Gai appeared in full costume.

There were two elves with him, one looking like she'd rather be anywhere _(up to and including being tortured by enemy nins)_ but here, and one perched on the shoulder of 'Santa,' flashing exuberant smiles and cheerful thumbs up. Kakashi would have smiled at poor Tenten, but Gai and Lee were just too damn disturbing.

"You know," he said in an undertone to Iruka. "It scares me that none of these kids seem to realize that it's him."

Iruka snorted. "Gai makes a very good Santa. He's been doing it for at least three years."

"And that is somehow even _more _disturbing."

The children swirled around 'Santa' as he passed out his bag of gifts. As wrapping paper flew and over-sugared children squealed, Gai made what had to be one of his most discreet exits ever. Kakashi stared after him in wonder. Not one Manly Tear or 'Springtime of our Youth.'

_That_ was just plain weird.

Finally, Iruka and the others began shooing the children out wishing them a happy holiday and with promises to see them after the new year. Kakashi looked down at a timid tug on his pants leg. The same girl who had been making calf eyes at him before held out a hand and dropped something. Instinctively, Kakashi caught it. She let go and hurried off, giggling.

Iruka rejoined him as he opened his hand to look at the neatly-folded origami kunai resting in his palm. Iruka glanced at it and his smile widened. "It seems like Etsuko put a lot of effort into making that just right. Her skills at origami aren't the best." He grinned mischievously up at Kakashi. "Looks like you have a fan, Kakashi-san."

Kakashi blinked down at the little paper ornament.

Iruka took it from him, smiling. "Since you're coming to spend the holidays with Naruto and I, I think it's only fair that this go on the tree." He took Kakashi's arm. "We still have a couple of hours to kill till the Teacher's party. What say we get some lunch?"


	9. I Saw &0 Kissing Santa Claus

Some sweet; some funny, I hope you enjoy this one... Oh, look, it's a longer chapter than before! Oh, and fair warning... **Chapter 10** will have **ADULT** content. So skip the chapter after this one if you don't want to read the smexing.  


* * *

Title: I saw ~~~~ Kissing Santa Claus  
Prompt: Mistletoe  
Author: Kita_the_spaz  
Rating: PG-13

* * *

They ate at a small little place near the academy, lingering over coffee. Iruka kept his face politely averted, but kept up a steady stream of small talk. Finally, Kakashi asked, "When do we need to get ready for the teacher's party?'

Iruka glanced up at the clock on the wall. "I suppose we had better."

He led the copy-nin out of the restaurant and turned up the narrow street—away from the academy.

"Uh, Iruka-sensei, don't we have to go back to the academy?"

Iruka grinned at him. "Nope. We have to go change first. Unless you want to look like a refugee from a child's party." Kakashi noticed the smear of icing on his pant's leg where tentative fingers had clutched.

Iruka had red punch spatters on his sleeves and flecks of sugar on his pants. "C'mon, I'm sure I can scrounge up something to fit you."

Kakashi looked nervously over his shoulder. "Um, aren't we supposed to be helping? I'm supposed to be helping you."

Iruka smiled and chuckled. "You are helping me. You're helping me relax after a job well done. Those of us who had to deal with the kid's party are pretty much done. We just show up at six for the real party." He shrugged. "They've got it easy this year, considering I already arranged for the refreshments and decorations."

Kakashi twitched and the corner of Iruka's mouth curved up even further. "Trust me, the nature of the refreshments and the décor is far different from the kid stuff of this afternoon."

Kakashi blinked and shifted his shoulders uncomfortably, even as he continued following the chuunin. "I was thinking more along the lines of, if you don't need my help anymore, I'll just go."

Iruka turned, frowning. "No. You're coming to the party. Consider it as part of the terms of your mission."

Kakashi frowned under his mask and shook his head. "I don't do parties."

Iruka stopped in his tracks and turned, balancing on the balls of his feet. "Well, you _are _doing this one. Now move your ass if you want time to shower and change before the party. I will drag your naked ass there if I have to, so don't think I won't."

Stunned and though he was loath to admit it, a little intimidated by Iruka's temper, Kakashi docilely followed Iruka, wondering all the while if this was Tsunade's way of punishing him for demanding a mission. Iruka led him up the stairs of one of the bachelor apartments and unlocked the door.

He stood back and waved Kakashi in first. Toeing off his sandals, Kakashi poised just inside the entryway as Iruka did the same, locking the door behind him.

Iruka kicked off his shoes and brushed past him into the main room of the small but neatly-kept apartment. He sighed, back to Kakashi. "Would you please relax?" He said. "I'm not going to hurt you. I just want you to come to the party with me, relax, have a drink or two and have a good time. There will be people you know there. Kotetsu and Izumo, and pretty much all of the jounin that cover advanced classes at the academy. That includes Gai, Asuma, Anko, Raidou, Genma and a few others." His shoulders slumped. "I'm going to see if I have something you can wear. Shower's at the end of the hall; towels, soap and shampoo are in the cabinet."

Kakashi watched as Iruka walked away, more than a little confused. He decided to accept the offer of the shower. After all, it wasn't like Iruka could really do him any harm. Even if he surprised him naked in the shower, Kakashi knew thirty-seven ways to kill a man with his bare hands, fourteen with a bar of soap and eight with a bottle of shampoo. Ten more if he could reach a towel. And if nothing else, he could always teleport himself as far as his apartment. He might be naked and covered in soap bubbles, but he'd live.

He was nearly through cleaning up when he heard the bathroom door open. "I've left some things that might fit you on the bed. You can try them on while I shower and change."

Ten minutes later, Kakashi was standing over the chuunin's bed, staring uncertainly at the clothes laid out on the kunai-patterned comforter. He picked up a jersey-knit sleeveless tank in subtle shades of blue. It had an attached mask and he wondered why Iruka had it. There was a sheer black shirt, a little large in the shoulders, to go over it and dusk-blue pants of some thick, soft material that slid over his calloused fingers almost sensuously.

Kakashi slipped into them and stood in front of the large mirror. The sheer top kept trying to slide down off one shoulder, but what could he expect when it was obviously tailored for Iruka's broader shoulders. He felt the presence behind him and turned, catching a strange look in the Iruka's brown eyes, which had looked too dark for just a second.

"That looks good on you."

Kakashi nodded, looking at the outfit the chuunin had chosen. His silk shirt was a dark red, shimmering a burgundy-wine color where it creased. His pants were a soft dove-gray and clung to his lean legs. "You look nice too." Kakashi managed, wondering why his throat had gone so dry. He was no stranger to the attractions of both sexes, but Iruka looked… good wasn't an adequate word to describe it. He wondered how he'd never noticed before.

Iruka smiled and reached out to adjust his mask a fraction. He reached up and pulled off the hiate'ate Kakashi had put on to cover his Sharingan. "Not shinobi tonight," he murmured softly. "Just people having a good time."

He pulled out a strip of black silk from a box on the nightstand and tied it around Kakashi's head, covering his scarred eyelid. Kakashi couldn't have stopped him if he tried.

Iruka smiled. "Let's go."

They were early, but not by much and not the only ones. Anko, dressed in something slinky and shimmering green (with strategic inserts of sheer fishnet), was seated on a table with a bottle of sake in one hand and a cup in the other, chatting with Kurenai and Izumo. Iruka steered Kakashi over to them. Anko looked up and wolf-whistled as they approached. "Damn, don't you clean up good!"

Kakashi scratched the back of his head sheepishly, wishing rather desperately for his book to hide behind, but Iruka had not given it back to him. Iruka smiled and leaned over to kiss Anko on the cheek. Much to Kakashi's surprise, the rather brash kunoichi blushed bright red and clapped a hand to her cheek as Iruka sauntered off to the refreshment table, returning in short order with a pair of glasses and a bottle of rich plum wine. He tipped some into a glass and passed it to Kakashi.

Anko tipped back her sake and slipped off the table. "Damn, some guys have all the luck."

Iruka stayed close to Kakashi's side all night, keeping the jounin from bolting when a rather smashed Noriko, one of the chuunin-sensei's from the academy, tried to get him to dance. Iruka smiled at her and took Kakashi's arm. "He's here with me." He told her mildly, but even the drunk woman could sense the undercurrent of threat in his tone. She hurried off.

Kakashi looked at the chuunin at his side and noticed that there was a slight flush of color across his scarred nose. How much had Iruka had to drink? Kakashi couldn't remember, but then, he wasn't sure of how many glasses he'd had either. He also wasn't sure why he seemed to have four feet, but as those extra feet were keeping him steady, he wasn't complaining. Iruka sighed and tugged him away from where Noriko was assaulting poor Kotetsu. Kakashi blinked owlishly as the green and red blur in the doorway resolved itself, and then wished he hadn't. Where was a good brainwashing attempt when you needed one?

He leaned over a little too heavily on Iruka's shoulder. "Please tell me I'm not seeing what I think I'm seeing. Please?"

Iruka blinked past him. "Nope. I see it too. I think I need to throw up." He said matter-of-factly. "Santa should not be making out with Anko."

Iruka picked up a bottle of wine and said mournfully. "I think I need to be a lot drunker than I am to deal with that." He raised his voice enough to be heard by the couple. "Gai, Anko; get a room!"

Iruka leaned against a wall, taking a long swig straight out of the bottle and looked up. His generous mouth quirked and he beckoned Kakashi a little closer. "D'you see what I see?"

Kakashi blinked, trying to bring his eye into focus. "Green." He said, pleased that he knew the answer.

Iruka shook his head and reached out to tug Kakashi into a better position for seeing the swag draped around the rafters of the room.

Suddenly Iruka's lips were on his, warm and damp through the thin cloth of the mask.

"It's mistletoe." Iruka breathed softly against his mouth.


	10. All I Want for Christmas is

**WARNING:** THIS PART OF THE POST IS RATED **NC-17.** If you have no wish to read that part of the story, just know that a drunken fuck ensued and you may safely pick up the story with tomorrows post. You will not have missed anything but hot, man-on-man smexing. **YOU HAVE BEEN ADVISED!  
**  
The author assumes no culpability for injuries incurred due to extreme bloodloss, fainting spells and/or the spilling of hot beverages. Please move all delicate equipment out of the area, heretofore known as the "drool zone." Thank you.

* * *

Title: All I want for Christmas is...  
Prompt: Fires  
Author: Kita-the-spaz  
Rating: **NC-17**

**Warning for NC-17 content.

* * *

  
**

It was a thing of hot mouths fastened on whatever bare skin they could reach, legs entwined and groins rubbing against each other, groping hands frantic to touch, to feel that skin that was even now flushed with desire. Kakashi managed a choked moan and suddenly fierce hands were tugging him closer. There was a moment of disorientation and then he was flat on his back.

Kakashi wasn't sure how they had wound up here, with Iruka's hot mouth working its way up his suddenly bared thigh, but he couldn't find a reason to object, not when Iruka's fingers were doing _that_ to his aching balls. Subtle tugs and a series of nips up his inner thigh had him hissing and arching up off the bed. "I-I-Irukaaaaa…" He managed.

"Shh…" The voice that answered him back was husky and dripping with pure lust. "Just feel."

He could do nothing but obey that sinful mouth that was even now working its way to his aching cock, swollen and curving up against his stomach. The lust was a thing all its own; an inferno burning in his belly, sending licks of flame down to his throbbing cock, to the balls that were drawn tight with the need to come. He keened and arched up into the warm mouth that suddenly closed over the head of his cock. "Don't…" His parched mouth managed only the slightest whisper.

Iuka hummed softly around the head of his cock, and Kakashi cried out, heels digging into the bed as his back bent, thrusting toward that sinfully hot mouth. "C-can't… going t-to…"

Iruka's only response was to take him in so deep that his nose brushed the pale hair at the base and to swallow. Kakashi keened and came hard, hands scrabbling for a hold on the sheets as he spilled his release down Iruka's willing throat.

When the last aftershocks had speared through his system like lightning, he slumped back to the bed, panting harshly. His skin twitched with little shocks as Iruka continued to lick and nip where his hip slanted inward. Without his willing it, his cock started to fill with blood again. Iruka's fingers curved around it, stroking roughly.

Kakashi reached down for the chuunin, wanting… needing something, and unsure just what. Iruka's smile could have been considered a lethal weapon as he pushed himself up to rest across Kakashi's chest. "Just feel…" He whispered again, his free hand brushing lightly across Kakashi's still clothed chest, the feel of the fabric rasping over his nipples making them tighten and ache. "Just relax. For tonight, it's just the two of us…"

Iruka rose from the bed and deftly stripped his clothes off, his dark eyes never leaving Kakashi's single exposed one. Kakashi watched him, the tan skin no less a tapestry of scars than his own pale flesh. Iruka's impressive cock was dusky and curved heavily to one side. Iruka smiled again, that same impish grin and spread his hands, as if asking, 'like what you see?' Kakashi's own cock stirred with new vigor.

Iruka slipped back onto the bed, one hand coming to rest heavily on Kakashi's groin, caressing and stroking. His warm brown eyes held Kakashi's own. "Do you trust me?" He asked huskily.

If he weren't so drunk on Iruka's presence and the wine, Kakashi might have actually said no. But the warm body beside him, vulnerable in his nakedness, demanded a different answer.

And he gave it without hesitation. "Yes."

Iruka's smile widened and he bent to press his lips to the bared skin just below Kakashi's eye. "Good."

He slipped back down until he was resting between Kakashi's spread thighs, his breath teasing the fine hair at Kakashi's groin. He dipped his head and lapped a wet stripe up the underside of Kakashi's aching flesh, paying special attention to the sensitive spot just below the head. Kakashi writhed, panting harshly through the mask as Iruka fisted his fingers around him, mouth busily teasing the tip. Kakashi dug his fingers into the sheets beneath him.

Strong fingers gripped his ass, tilting his hips upward, as that wet mouth worked its way further down until Iruka was ever-so-gently pulling at his balls, mouthing first one and then the other, rolling his tongue around them in ways that has a thin whine coming out of Kakashi's throat.

When he felt a slick finger drag from the base of his balls to gently circle the ring of muscle, he didn't tense up, even thought he knew what was coming. The finger slipped inside with surprisingly little resistance and Kakashi hissed softly as it probed. Then it crooked and the world briefly went away behind a soundless explosion of white fire behind his eyes. When he came back to earth, panting and shaking, he realized that there were two fingers stretching him wider and a third easing its way in. He was shaking wildly and pushing back against them as they kept teasingly brushing that spot inside that set off fireworks in his blood.

He didn't even recognize the voice that said, _"Please!"_ But some tiny part of his mind that wasn't washed away in the stretch of muscles and the slow burn of pleasure reminded him that it was his own mouth begging.

Then those wonderful fingers were gone. But even as he yearned after them, he felt them grip his hip firmly. Something blunt and much larger than the fingers was pressing against the loosened ring of muscle. "Breathe," came Iruka's strained voice. "And push out."

Kakashi could do nothing but obey. He groaned low in his throat as Iruka pushed past the ring of muscles. Iruka's hands stroked his hips; his flanks. "Relax; push out."

He obeyed and was rewarded as the first stinging wave of pain faded under the startling feel of fullness and pressure as Iruka seated himself fully inside him. Then Iruka moved, pulling out almost all the way. He pushed back in, pressing against that wonderful spot that send sparks rocketing through Kakashi's blood and he moaned and bucked his hips up into that glorious pressure.

As Iruka groaned and rotated his hips, each movement pushed him farther and father toward his inevitable orgasm. Kakashi dug his fingers into the broad shoulders above him, heaving and thrusting his hips into the push of that cock deep inside him.

Close… he was so… Suddenly, Iruka's pace shifted into a punishing rhythm and his hand gripped Kakashi's neglected cock. One rough pull was all it took and Kakashi cried out, coming hard into Iruka's hand. He heard Iruka's low groan and felt stuffed to the hilt as Iruka pushed hard against him.

They slumped there together, sticky and sweating as they slowly came down from the peak. Kakashi sighed as Iruka slipped slowly out of him, followed by the feeling of warm fluids seeping out of him. Iruka rose as Kakashi savored the slow burn of his muscles easing. Then Iruka was back, a warm towel gliding over him to clean evidence away. Iruka wiped him down and then gently fingers eased a soothing cream into and around his stinging passage.

Kakashi dragged his eye open, tensing as Iruka slipped back into the bed, and pulled him against that broad, tanned chest. But Iruka did nothing else, except brush fingers against his cloth-covered lips, and Kakashi realized that somehow, he'd never even been unmasked. It was enough to allow himself to relax and let sleep claim him. He heard Iruka's amused voice as the darkness dragged him down. "If you think that felt good, wait until I let you be the one on top."

* * *

We now return you to your regularly scheduled crack!


	11. The Twelve Agonies of the Morning After

So, if everyone has recovered from the nosebleeds and dehydration of the last chapter, I bring the morning after. I hope you all enjoy!

I'd like to thank everyone that read, reviewed or favorited this. I am trying hard to get all 25 days written over on LJ, so forgive me if my posting is irregular and I don't answer any reviews until later! I'll try, but no promises! Love you all and happy holidays!

* * *

Title: The Twelve Agonies of the Morning After  
Prompt: Hangovers/Intoxication  
Author: Kita_the_spaz  
Rating: PG-13 (strong language and references of the events of last night)

* * *

What the fuck?

He remembered wet heat, the slick slide of skin against skin and… and… and why did his head hurt so fucking much? Kakashi dragged his eye open, feeling gritty and sore. Where the hell was he? The room smelled of sandalwood and soap, not of dog and dusting left too long unattended. There was another smell in the air and his brain kicked in as he recognized it. He didn't…

He felt the warm weight of an arm draped over his torso and realized he _did._

Kakashi turned his head just slightly, praying the insignificant movement wouldn't wake his bed-partner. Who had he…? He remembered the party and Anko, and he had vague memories of that exceedingly drunk woman… Noriko, was that her name… hitting on him.

Brown hair and a scarred nose… oh, shit. The memories crashed in; mistletoe, that hot mouth molesting his and… and… oh, hell.

His stomach rebelled and he twisted out of the other man's grasp and ran for the bathroom he could see down the hall. He made it just in time and wrenched down his mask to vomit sour-wine and bile. He heaved until there was nothing in his stomach, and then dry-heaved for good measure.

There was a presence behind him and a tanned hand offered a towel and a glass of cool water.

"Rinse your mouth out and I'll get you some painkillers."

Shaking, Kakashi obeyed, rinsing and spitting and wiping the sour taste from his lips.

"Done?"

"Yeah." Kakashi rasped. Now he remembered why he didn't drink. He got stupid when he was drunk. Not to mention the morning after was always a killer. Sometimes literally.

"Take these. You'll feel better." Again the tanned hand dropped into his line of sight, holding a couple of painkillers. Kakashi looked up, noting that Iruka was looking pointedly away from where he was crouched, and accepted the pills. He swallowed them quickly and tugged the mask back in place. The hand returned, this time holding… oh, gods… a pair of boxers, and Kakashi was mortified to realize he was naked from the waist down.

He turned to look up at the chuunin, only to realize the man had turned his back and stepped away. Flushing, Kakashi yanked on the boxers. They rode low on his hips, but it was better than being naked. He glared at Iruka's back. _I got drunk off my ass and fucked him… no, wait. _ A flash of memory and he remembered Iruka murmuring, _"If you think that felt good, wait until I let you be the one on top."_ Check, he'd been on the receiving end. _Ass definitely hurts… damn._

Iruka spoke without turning around. "If you're done trying to glare holes in me, come to the kitchen, I'm got some tea that will settle your stomach and dull the headache until the painkillers kick in. Sound reasonable?"

Kakashi's stomach took that opportunity to rebel again, and after he dry-heaved a few more times, he followed the chuunin into the kitchen. Iruka directed him to sit at the table and busied himself with making the tea. Kakashi sorted through his hazy memories of last night. He remembered the party and drinking far too much of the sweet plum wine. He remembered, seeing Anko and Gai happily molesting each other and then Iruka pointing up and asking what he saw… And then the kiss…

Blood surged in his groin as _other_ memories came to the fore. He flushed red as Iruka suddenly set a cup of tea down in front of him. "Drink that. It'll help."

Kakashi sniffed, identifying mint, chamomile, and several other herbs that had gone into the tea.

"It's not poisoned, Kakashi-san. If I had any intentions on your life, I think I would have done something before I slept with you." There was amusement in Iruka's voice. "That's a mixture I get from Shizune-san, because sometimes I get overstressed and it upsets my stomach."

Kakashi frowned, but picked up the cup. Iruka politely looked down at his own cup so Kakashi could drink.

Sipping, he found the herbal taste oddly pleasant and it did seem to be helping his stomach a bit. He shifted in his chair and couldn't help a pained sound. Pulling his mask back up, he glared at Iruka, trying to summon up his earlier indignation, but only bringing to mind the events that had led to that particular discomfort.

Iruka snorted into his cup. "Don't try to pull the deflowered virgin card on me. I've read Icha Icha too." His lips curled up. "As I recall, you enjoyed it too."

Suddenly, those dark eyes burned with a familiar hunger and Iruka rose from his seat. "Don't tell me this is a masculine pride thing, either." He stepped closer and grinned that mischievous smile of his again. "Because, I said you got to be on top the next time, didn't I?"


	12. It Came Upon a Peppermint Stick

Title: It Came upon a Peppermint Stick  
Prompt: Candy Canes  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG 13

* * *

Kakashi wasn't sure of mechanics of a morning after a drunken fuck, but he could count the number of times he'd had a drunken fuck on the fingers of one hand and still have four fingers left over. He was pretty sure that it wasn't sitting in Iruka's kitchen clad in boxers that weren't his and the masked shirt he'd been wearing last night, sipping tea, while Iruka cooked bland foods that wouldn't upset his slowly settling stomach.

He wondered whether he should run now. Iruka seemed to be implying that he had every intention of this…_thing_ being more than a one time event. "Next time," he'd said.

Kakashi was startled out of his thoughts as Iruka set a plate down in front of him. Toast and grilled fish and miso. There was rice, but Kakashi didn't really want to think about that right now. His stomach still roiled. He sipped at the soup as Iruka went back to his tasks in the kitchen, pointedly not looking at Kakashi.

Kakashi watched him as he ate. Iruka moved with smooth efficiency around the kitchen, stirring a pot on the stove with care, even as he put dishes in the sink and put things away. Iruka seemed perfectly at ease with having him there.

His memories of last night were hazy, but what he did remember… His face flushed and he felt his groin trying to stir back to life. He still hurt, but the pain was fading.

"Feeling better?"

Startled by the seeming reading of his mind, he looked up. Iruka still had his back turned, concentrating on whatever it was he was stirring.

"Some." Kakashi sniffed, trying to identify what Iruka was cooking. "What are we doing now?"

"Today, we go help close up the school for the duration of the winter break. Then, I have some errands to run."

"Not what I meant." Kakashi growled.

Iruka concentrated on pouring the contents of the pan into a pair of cups. "I know. Look, Kakashi-san, we take things as they come." He tilted his head and smiled, even as he dug in a stoneware jar on the counter. "Where…? There you are." Plastic crinkled as he worked. "I would like to have dinner with you again tonight and see where things go from there. You have to admit, even drunk, the sex was great."

He turned back to the table with the two mugs and set one down in front of Kakashi. "Here, if your stomach can handle it, drink this. It's getting cold out."

Kakashi stared down into the mug of hot chocolate, with a peppermint stick as a stirrer. He glanced up at Iruka in time to see another peppermint stick slide slowly between the chuunin's lips. Iruka smiled at him and let it droop before using his agile tongue to drag it back up and deeper between his teeth. Kakashi watched as the tanned man _molested_ the candy.

"Bathroom…" He choked out, and ran, trying desperately to hide the growing evidence of what Iruka's little display had done to him.


	13. Joy to the Sensei's

Title: Joy to the Sensei's  
Prompt: Late Gift Shopping  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG

* * *

Iruka was waiting for him when he came out of the bathroom, but the chuunin said nothing. "Come on. Get showered and dressed. We still have work to do." Iruka handed him a pile of clothing and a towel. Kakashi stared at him numbly for a moment before moving to obey.

Pausing inside the bathroom, he looked down at the clothing. It was standard issue uniform, the dark shirt and pants. The shirt had an attached mask. Kakashi held it for a moment, wondering, not for the first time, what Iruka was doing with clothing tailored with masks. It wasn't like Kakashi was the only shinobi in the village that wore a mask, though he knew he was the most adamant about not taking his off, but he'd never seen the chuunin wear one, not even when the academy had been closed down and the teachers taking missions.

He heard Iruka moving around in the other room and sighed, setting the clothing down. The mystery would have to wait for another day.

He showered and dressed. Thankfully the pants had a drawstring, because they hung low on his narrow hips. The shirt fit a little loose, but well enough. Still toweling his hair dry, he came out of the bathroom. Iruka was dressed and the hair he was brushing up into his usual ponytail was damp.

He caught Kakashi's odd look and grinned. "I water Junko's plants while she's out on missions, so I have a key. I borrowed her shower while you were using mine."

Iruka tied up his hair and tossed Kakashi his vest and a scarf. He smiled. "Lets go."

They arrived at the school and Iruka let them into the teacher's lounge. Apparently Kakashi hadn't been the only one suffering a hangover. The other teachers straggled in, most of them looking worse for the wear. The woman he vaguely remembered hitting on him at the party looked like she was three days dead. She snarled at Iruka and accepted the cup of coffee he held out to her. "Never fucking drinking again." She grumbled into the coffee.

Iruka chuckled under his breath. "You say that every time you get a hangover, Noriko-sensei. And you'll still do it."

"Oh, leave me to wallow in my misery in peace, why don't you?"

"You're just jealous."

"That you don't ever get hangovers? Hell, yes." The redhead grumbled into her coffee. "Go away now, and let me die in peace."

Iruka chuckled again and patted her on the head, earning an irritated swat.

The man Iruka had introduced before as Hikaru stood up. "If we're all through bemoaning hangovers and such, lets get this over with, shall we? Everyone, make sure your classrooms are ready for when the students come back after break then we'll run a quick check and make sure everything is locked up. Then we have nearly a week free of students."

A muted and rather lackluster cheer went up. Kakashi followed Iruka back to his classroom. Iruka was swift and efficient as he directed Kakashi to clean the blackboard while he straightened up the classroom itself, putting forgotten books on the shelves and making certain the all the practice weapons were accounted for and safely locked up. When they were done, they joined with the other teachers in making sure the windows were locked and that the building was safely shut up for the holiday break.

The cheer as Hikaru locked the main entrance was neither muted nor lacking in enthusiasm. Iruka waved a cheery goodbye to the other teachers as he took Kakashi's arm and dragged him in the direction of the main market square.

"What are we doing now?" Kakashi considered pulling his arm free and thought of the grief Iruka would give him for it. Safest not to, then.

Iruka smiled, his cheeks flushed with the cold wind. "I have to pick up the things to make Christmas dinner for you, me, Naruto and Sasuke is Naruto manages to convince him to come along. And I have to pick up a few last minute gifts. You should buy gifts for those three, at least. You can give Sakura hers early."

The thought had Kakashi slightly panicked, but he kept his voice unconcerned as she asked, "Mah… What should I buy them?"

Iruka grinned at him. "Don't look so worried. It's not too hard. What do they like?"

Kakashi considered. "Well, Naruto… he likes ramen, ramen and ramen."

That got a laugh out of Iruka. "Too true. Let's see, you could get him a ramen bowl or vouchers for the ramen stand. Maybe the bowl as the main gift and the vouchers for a stocking stuffer. He'd like that." He grinned. "See, that was easy. How about Sakura?"

"Sasuke."

That got another full-throated laugh. "Well, since I don't think delivering a tied up Uchiha would work, what else can you think of?"

Kakashi racked his brains. During one of their missions, they had stopped overnight at an onsen just inside the borders of Fire Country. It had taken two hours to get Sakura out of the baths. "She likes onsens."

"Okay, that one's easy too. Either get her a gift certificate to one of the local hot spring onsens or a selection of bath things. Now, what about Sasuke? And don't say Itachi's head on a platter."

"I won't say it, but that doesn't make it any less true."

Iruka snorted. "Come on, what else?"

"Weapons?"

"You can do better than that."

"More weapons?"


	14. The Three Students

Title: The Three Students  
Prompt: Shopping Rush  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG

* * *

Iruka scowled at him. "Come on."

He pointed the jounin toward an outdoor display. Kakashi stared warily at the crowds and lagged back, until Iruka took his arm and tugged him along. "Iruka-sensei…"

"They don't bite." Iruka chuckled.

"Are you sure about that?" Kakashi dodged a frowning matron, who looked like she might eat anyone who got in her way.

"Yes." Iruka smiled up at him and Kakashi relented, following the tugs on his arm. "You might get elbowed, shoved, mauled, and/or otherwise mutilated, but I've never been bitten."

Kakashi cast him a look of horror, which only prompted Iruka to laugh. Kakashi growled under his breath as Iruka pointed toward a vendor and made his way through the jostling crowds.

"How about this?" Iruka held up a pottery ramen bowl, glazed in shades of red.

Kakashi shook his head. "Too red." He scowled down at the choices until something caught his eye. It was the same shade of obnoxious orange that Naruto favored. There was a pattern of bright green frogs painted on the rim. He picked it up and held it up for Iruka to see.

The smile Iruka gave him was dazzling and Kakashi caught his breath. "Good choice. See, you do know more about your students than you thought you did. That's perfect for Naruto." He hunted a little among the sets of chopsticks until he came up with a pair that had painted frogs along the top, and handed them to Kakashi. "How about these, too?"

Kakashi nodded and paid the smiling woman running the stall. She deftly boxed both of his purchases and put them in a bag for him, which he numbly accepted. Iruka took his arm again. "I have wrapping paper at my place. You can wrap them there. Now, that shop down there has some very nice bath stuff. Do you want to look at that or were you going to go with a ticket to the hot springs?"

Kakashi frowned, looking down. He mumbled under his breath, until a sharp elbow dug into his side. "You are not one of my students, so I can't exactly yell at you to stop mumbling, but it makes you hard to hear in this crowd. Now what did you say?"

"The ticket…" Kakashi said quietly. Anything to get out of this crush all the faster.

Iruka nodded. "We can pick that up tomorrow since it's on the other side of the village. Now, what about Sasuke?"

Kakashi shrugged. "It's hard to tell what he wants, beside vengeance. He doesn't show much emotion."

"Sounds like other people I know." Iruka added tartly, giving him a sideways glance. Before Kakashi could protest, he held up a hand. "I'll help you out on this one. He likes to read. When he was in my class he read anything he could get his hands on."

Kakashi knew there was a bookstore nearby and pointed toward it. Iruka snorted under his breath. "Somehow, I'm not surprise that you know where the nearest bookstore is. But you're not getting him anything that's in any way related to your favorite choice of reading material."

Kakashi grinned sheepishly and followed Iruka down the aisles of the bookstore. He expected him to head for where the books on tactics and weaponry or maybe history were, but instead Iruka led him down to where some more popular authors were. He pulled a thick hardcover off one of the upper shelves. The leather binding looked rather dull, but when he flipped it open he was surprised to see the lush illustrations inside and the text he skimmed seemed very out of character for the boy he knew.

He looked uncertainly at Iruka.

Iruka's smile was wistful as he ran his fingers along one of the edges. "Christmas is a time for happiness. He hasn't had much in his life, but I know he's got a weakness for stories that end like fairy tales, with a happily ever after… but he'll never admit it out loud. This one is a good choice. The title doesn't give away what it is and it looks dull enough that Naruto won't bother to tease him about it, but the story on the inside…" Iruka nodded and reached over to gently close the book. "It's a good choice for him."

Kakashi was startled by the insight into his student. He followed Iruka back to the register and paid for the book. The old man behind the counter smiled at them both and offered to put the book in a gift box. Iruka grinned back and elbowed Kakashi again.

"Yes, please."

The old man wrapped the book in tissue paper and nestled it in a solid box. Kakashi paid and they made their way out of the store. Iruka smiled at him. "Let me pick up some groceries and we'll get some dinner. Do you want to eat out or go back to my place to wrap these?"

Kakashi swallowed at the hungry look in Iruka's brown eyes. It was pretty clear he wasn't thinking about food. "Uh…"


	15. Pretty Paper

Title: Pretty Paper

Prompt: Wrapping Paper

Author: Kita

Rating PG-13

* * *

Kakashi opted for eating out. It seemed safest. He mulled things over as he followed Iruka in search of a restaurant.

To be honest, he wasn't at all sure what to think of this version of Iruka-sensei. He'd never give the man much thought before, and only minimal thought after his now-infamous blowup at the chuunin exams.

But this Iruka wasn't like the unassuming schoolteacher or the blushing Mission room worker.

If he weren't quite sure it wasn't a henge or a genjutsu or any other infiltration attempt he could think of, he'd say it wasn't the same man. But he'd tested the theory, by the simple expedient of glancing at the man with his sharingan. Unique chakra patterns couldn't be duplicated, by any known means, and he'd known Iruka's from the very first time he'd met the man.

Iruka and two other chuunin had been on a courier mission and had encountered Kakashi and the missing-nin he'd been fighting. Kakashi had gotten a good look at Iruka's chakra pattern when the unassuming man paused to toss a handful of shuriken and kunai at the nin—distracting him long enough for Kakashi to get in a solid blow that had laid the rogue out-cold with a broken cheek and jaw. (He'd gotten bitched out for that one too. It had taken a day of force-healing to get the man in any shape to take under interrogation.)

So it _was_ really Iruka, but he was so much more than he'd ever thought the chuunin was. Kakashi deliberately steered his thoughts away from the hazy, alcohol-saturated memories of the hot slide of skin on skin. The feel of that lean body moving against him… in him. Kakashi shook himself out of his reverie as Iruka touched his arm. "How about here?"

Kakashi knew he was flushed, but hoped the mask hid the color in his cheeks from sight. "Fine." He mumbled.

Iruka chuckled and somehow Kakashi knew that the chuunin knew what he was thinking. The restaurant was small and dark and the woman at the counter had the look of a retired kunoichi. She smiled at them and waved them to a table with a hand that had only the thumb and two fingers. "Hello, Iruka-san! It's been a long time. How are you?" She greeted Iruka warmly.

Iruka grinned back at her as they took seats and set their bags on the floor by their feet. "Better all the time, Chiyoko-san. How are you?"

Her smile was radiant. She rested her maimed hand against her belly. "As you said, better all the time."

Iruka's smile grew another inch or so. "That's wonderful. You must be thrilled."

She beamed. "Oh, yes. And I can't stop Kenichi from telling everyone we see. He's started redecorating the spare room already." She handed them menus and set glasses of water on the table. "And you? Are you ever planning on having any of your own? You'd be a wonderful father."

Iruka shot Kakashi a sideways glance. "I doubt it, Chiyoko-san. I have more than enough children every day to need any of my own."

She sighed, and patted his shoulder. "Whatever you say, Iruka-san. So is there anyone special in your life, besides Naruto?"

Iruka's eyes slid to Kakashi and he smiled softly. "Oh, I think there _could_ be."

The kunoichi laughed. "That's wonderful. I'm glad for you. Oh, here I am nattering and you haven't even opened your menus yet." She hurried off.

Kakashi opened his menu, but the words printed on it didn't even register. He was watching the chuunin over the top, mulling over the conversation with the woman. _He thinks there could be?_ _What the hell? Did Iruka think he…?_

Iruka smiled and caught his eye. "Don't think so hard, Kakashi-san. I can smell the smoke from here. We're just here to get something to eat."

Kakashi frowned at his menu. _Did Iruka like him? Was that what this was all about?_

Tanned fingers gripped the edge of the menu and tugged it down until they were eye to eye again. "You're doing it again. And yes, it was you I was talking about."

Kakashi spent the rest of the meal in a daze, pondering the implications of what Iruka had just said. When they were done eating, (Kakashi doing so automatically and Iruka keeping his eyes fixed on his plate) Iruka led him back out into the evening air. The wind had picked up with the setting of the sun and it was quite cold.

"Kakashi-san?" Iruka's voice was soft. "Did you want to wrap those now or later? I told you, I have wrapping paper you can borrow."

Kakashi slowly looked up. "Now."

Iruka looked away and nodded. He led the way back to his apartment. When they were inside, Iruka toed off his sandals and stepped out of Kakashi's way.

Kakashi took a deep breath, decision made. He reached up to tug down his mask. Gentle hands stopped him. "No." Iruka said, brown eyes sparkling at him. He leaned in and softly kissed the end of Kakashi's nose through the dark fabric. "I'm patient. I'll wait to unwrap my gift."


	16. Good Rest Ye, Shinobi

Title: Good Rest Ye, Shinobi  
Prompt: Warm Blankets  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG

* * *

After a rather amusing incident teaching Kakashi how to actually wrap gifts, Iruka made some more hot cocoa and settled on the couch next to Kakashi. He added marshmallows this time, rather than peppermint sticks. Kakashi hadn't reacted well to his molesting the candy. Or rather he had reacted too well. Iruka didn't want to scare him off.

Kakashi was staring at the tree Iruka had set up a few days ago, his visible eye distant and distracted. He was thinking too hard again. Iruka sighed and shifted marginally closer to the other man. He kept out of his personal space, though. Let Kakashi have that illusion of distance as a comfort zone. "Kakashi-san?"

Kakashi blinked and glanced back at him, a hint of pink just showing over the edge of his mask. "Meh?"

"Would you like to stay the night?" Before the jounin could protest, Iruka raised a hand. "Before you overreact, I won't do anything you don't want. But it's late and cold out there and warm in here. And sometimes this apartment gets a little empty." Iruka let a wistful smile cross his face. "I have a futon you can use, if you're unwilling to share the bed." He knew there was a hint of red on his own cheeks. "I'd like you to stay."

Kakashi stared down into his mug, silent for a long moment. Iruka sighed and rose. "I understand. I'll see you to—"

"You didn't give me a chance to answer."

Iruka paused, turning back to the lean man on the couch. He refused to let himself look at all hopeful. "You were so quiet; I thought you were thinking of a way to turn down my offer."

Kakashi stood, stretching almost indolently. "Why would I want to turn down an offer of a warm bed instead of going back to my apartment? I forgot to turn the heater on. It's probably cold as hell in there."

Iruka felt a smile stretch his lips. "Thank you."

Kakashi smile was visible through the thin fabric of the mask. Iruka set his mug down and stepped in close. He slid his arms around the narrow waist and rested his head against the jounin's shoulder. "Thank you," he said again, breathing the words quietly into the cloth-covered neck. He relaxed as he felt the strong arms hesitantly return the embrace.

When they had finished the cocoa, Iruka led Kakashi back to his bedroom. He offered him a pair of sweatpants to change into while he changed into his sleepwear. He brushed his teeth and dug up a spare toothbrush so Kakashi could do the same. Quietly, while the other man was in the bathroom, Iruka slid into the bed and moved as far to one side as the bed allowed.

When Kakashi came out of the bathroom he hesitated for a moment before sliding into the bed. But then he did the unexpected. Iruka let out an undignified squeak as Kakashi reached out and pulled him close, fitting an arm around his shoulders. At the sound, Kakashi let out a hesitant chuckle and murmured, "The blankets are warm, but this is warmer."

Iruka smiled and let himself relax against the warm body beside him, basking in the heat and the fact that Kakashi was in his bed willingly. He was nearly asleep when Kakashi muttered quietly that he'd still have to go to his cold apartment to get fresh clothes.

Iruka smiled a sleepy grin and murmured, "Not necessarily."

He was already asleep as Kakashi turned to him with a questioning look.


	17. Let It Snow

Title: Let it Snow  
Prompt: Ice  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG

* * *

Kakashi snapped awake in the manner he was trained to, but it took his mind a few seconds to remember where he was. The feel of a warm body against him, legs twined with his own, was a startling reminder. But not an unpleasant one.

Iruka was warm and comfortable beside him, head tucked in the crook of Kakashi neck and one arm wrapped around his waist. Kakashi shifted slightly and Iruka's brown eyes snapped open, dazed, but quickly regaining his senses. He smiled, a breathtakingly open expression. For one moment, there was nothing hidden in those eyes, in that smile.

"Kakashi-san…" Iruka breathed. His fingers crept up to rest against one masked cheek. "I thought I was dreaming again."

"Again?" Kakashi said softly; thinking how warm those fingers were, even through the fabric of his mask.

Something in those rich eyes shuttered, closing away. Iruka was still smiling, but it was a tad less genuine than before. "We all dream, Kakashi-san."

"What were you dreaming of?" Kakashi felt compelled to ask.

Iruka's fingers fell away from his cheek and his lips twitched. "Breakfast. I'm starving."

It was hardly a graceful diversion, and Kakashi wasn't buying it. "What was it?"

Iruka untangled himself from Kakashi and rose, elongating his body in a stretch that would have done a cat proud. He sighed and glanced back over his shoulder at Kakashi. "Things that could have been. Just memories and intangible clouds. Nothing important."

Something told Kakashi it was important, but he would get no more out of Iruka on the subject. A towel hit him in the face. "Take a shower while I fix breakfast. We still have to go pick up the gift you were going to get for Sakura, and if I'm going to have a full house for the holidays, I'll pick up some more stocking stuffers and the makings for some cookies. I really haven't had a reason to bake for a long time." There was that brief shadow in his eyes, but he smiled as he offered Kakashi sweatpants and another of those mysterious masked shirts, this one in a soft gray. Kakashi resolved that he was going to find out why the chuunin had those shirts if it killed him.

He showered quickly and dressed, leaving the water still running. He crept to the door, listening to the sounds of the other man moving around the kitchen and humming softly. Pleased, he slipped over to the dresser, easing open the drawer he'd seen Iruka take the masked shirt out of. There were socks. He frowned and moved them aside. There. A dark charcoal gray. He reached for it.

"Haven't you heard it's not polite to snoop? Especially in a fellow shinobi's home." The voice was filled with some mixture of amusement and another emotion he couldn't name. Iruka leaned against the doorframe, arms folded and head tipped to one side as he watched him. He was smiling, but it wasn't very cheerfully.

"Meh…" Kakashi scratched the back of his head.

"Just turn the water off," Iruka sighed. "No point in wasting it. Breakfast is ready."

Kakashi returned to the bathroom. When he came back out, Iruka was sliding the drawer shut. There was no sign of the gray shirt he'd spotted.

After breakfast, they left for the shops. There was a dusting of white on the railing of the stairs. Iruka grinned. "It's snowing! Kakashi-san, look!"

Kakashi turned his gaze up to the cloudy sky. "Mah. It's not going to stick. It's too warm for it."

Iruka turned to him with a pout more suited to a child. "Spoil my fun, why don't you?" he laughed.

Kakashi shrugged. "What? It's the truth."

Iruka ran a hand along the railing until he'd gathered a handful. He chucked it at Kakashi, who dodged. "I like snow." Iruka said. "It's too warm here to snow much. The last time it did, I was still a pre-genin." He said wistfully. "The pond iced over and my mother taught me how to ice-skate."

Kakashi smiled. "My father taught me that year too."

Iruka took his hand as they walked and Kakashi let him.


	18. Up on the Ceiling

Title: Up on the Ceiling  
Prompt: Bad Presents  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG

* * *

The stop at the onsen to buy a gift certificate for Sakura went well and didn't take long at all. Iruka warned him that the next stop would be nowhere near as pleasant. He wasn't kidding. Kakashi shuddered at the crowded shop. There seemed to be people everywhere, even a few shinobi using chakra to stick to the walls to avoid the crush. Kakashi wanted to be on the ceiling, or better yet, anywhere but here.

But Iruka had firm hold of his arm as he towed him into the crush. Iruka grinned as he pointed to a wall of stockings, the kind for hanging on mantles, not for on feet. Kakashi followed the tugs on his arm until Iruka reached the wall. "I have stockings for Naruto and I, but I have to get ones for you and Sasuke."

"So he is coming?" Kakashi asked, glaring at one old woman who had elbowed past him to reach for a stocking. She wasn't intimidated and snatched the gaudy gold stocking like he might try and take it from her.

Iruka shrugged and deftly sidestepped a pair of giggling teenagers. "Don't know. But I believe in being prepared. I'm hoping Naruto will be able to talk him into it. If not, I may go try and talk to him." His eyes saddened. "No one deserves to be alone over Christmas."

He selected a dark blue stocking. "I think this one will do for him. And for you…" He contemplated for a moment before picking up a pale silver one decorated in snowflakes. "This one."

Kakashi snorted under his breath. "Let me guess, Naruto's is orange?"

Iruka grinned. "Did you know he can knit? He says one of the old grannies, who wasn't afraid of him, taught him when he was still very young. He knitted stockings for both of us, couple of years back." Iruka laughed. "And yes, his is the most awful shade of orange you can imagine, but I was so proud of him for making it. And then he made one for me."

"Is it orange too?"

Iruka shook his head, chuckling. "It's an odd sort of silver-gray-bluish color. I have no idea where he found yarn that color, but he looked up a picture of a real dolphin and said that it was the closest thing he could find to its color. I never had the heart to tell him I got sick of the dolphin thing when I was a pre-genin. It means a lot to me that he put that much effort into it. He can be incredibly thoughtful when he's trying to be."

Kakashi thought about that for a moment and nodded. Naruto could be very thoughtful sometimes, until you forgot he acted the idiot. Then he would do something stupid and you would remember…

Iruka picked up several kinds of candy and the odd trinket. Then he got a mischievous grin on his face and started hunting the shelves with a single-minded determination.

"What are you looking for?" Kakashi asked curiously, trailing after the chuunin.

"Every year, Naruto and I have this thing where we find what is probably the singularly most spectacularly ugly and useless thing ever to use as a stocking stuffer, along with the usual thoughtful and useful gifts. Whoever can make the other groan wins for that year and has to display the thing prominently in their house until next Christmas. Naruto won last year, so this time I'm going to win." His childlike look of joyful mischief was startling. "You look over there and I'll look over here. Call me if you see anything."

And then he was alone in the throng. Kakashi shrugged and began perusing the shelves. He was getting better at this, he thought as he dodged a pair of mothers with toddlers in tow. He'd been in the store for nearly twenty minutes without wanting to flee in terror or blow something up. He saw something that caught his eye and picked it up to look at. It was a clear stone with a snowflake etched inside.

"_I like snow."_ Iruka's remembered voice rang in his ears and with a smile; he decided that he would get it for Iruka. Something else stood out in the corner of his eye and when he turned to look at it he couldn't help but curl his lips in dismay. That was probably the singularly most ugly thing he'd ever seen. It was perfect.

Hiding the small snowflake crystal in his sleeve, he picked up the statue and used his chakra to leap up. He stuck to the ceiling and looked around until he spotted Iruka. Smiling, he strolled upside-down along the ceiling, until he was right next to where the chuunin was shopping. He released his hold on the ceiling and dropped noiselessly down next to Iruka. "Yo."

Iruka was too well trained to jump and shriek like the civilian woman nearby did, but he did startle and had a kunai out before he even blinked.

"Kakashi!" he scolded. "Idiot. Unless you have a deathwish, don't do that again."

Kakashi ignored that, holding out the small statue he had found. "How's this?"

Iruka stared for a long moment before his lips curled up in the most devious smile Kakashi had seen from him yet. "Oh, yeah. That's perfect."

He took it from Kakashi and leaned up to drop a brief kiss on his masked cheek. "Perfect, Kakashi-san."

Iruka smiled as he dropped it into his basket. "I know the crowd in here is probably getting to you. So if you want to wait outside while I check out, go ahead. Then we'll get the things for cookies and something for lunch."

Kakashi nodded and was about to go when he hesitated. He turned and pressed a masked kiss to Iruka's forehead before trotting off. He made it to the front and dropped enough to cover the crystal snowflake and tax into a startled salesgirl's hand, darting out of the store before Iruka could see him. He felt strangely exhilarated as he stowed the small crystal in his hip pouch.

A few minutes later, Iruka came out. He was grinning as he took Kakashi's outstretched hand.


	19. The Little Frosting Incident

Title: The Little Frosting Incident  
Prompt: Frosting  
Author: Kita  
Rating: R

* * *

After they finished shopping, they went back to Iruka's apartment. Iruka hung the stockings on the mantel over the very small fireplace and wrapped a few of the trinkets he'd bought in scraps of wrapping paper. The awful statue was boxed and wrapped very prettily. Iruka grinned at Kakashi's look. "I always do this. Make it look nice and important. It pisses him off. The prettier the wrapping, the uglier the gift inside."

He deposited the wrapped trinkets back into one of the bags and stowed them in the cabinet under one of the overflowing bookcases. "I always wait until Christmas eve to stuff the stockings."

He turned back to Kakashi. "Now that that's done, would you like to help me make cookies? I want to make sure I have enough since I have a full house this year."

Kakashi eyed him askance. "I don't know how to make cookies."

Iruka's smile spread. "Then it's as good a time as any to learn. Come on."

Kakashi watched uncertainly as Iruka retrieved the ingredients he'd bought earlier. He cleared the counters and turned the oven on before patiently instructing Kakashi on how to make cookie dough. Kakashi mixed the dough for the chocolate chip cookies while Iruka deftly put together the ingredients for three other kinds of cookies. He caught Kakashi's look and grinned. "Half the time when I'm baking, I wind up with someone dropping by. I think they're magically attracted to the smell or something. So it always pays to have more dough ready to go. And with Naruto's sweet tooth, we'll be lucky to get a single cookie between us."

He reached over to dip a fingertip in the bowl Kakashi was stirring and taste the dough. His face relaxed into an expression of bliss. "Um… Perfect."

Kakashi eyed him oddly. "You do know there are raw eggs in that, don't you?"

Blinking, Iruka pulled his finger slowly from his lips, pink tongue flashing out to make sure he hadn't missed any bits of batter. "So? Am I to take it that you have never experienced the joy of cookie dough?"

Kakashi eyed the mess in the bowl dubiously. He liked cookies, but he'd always gotten them after they were baked. What was the big deal about the uncooked dough?

Iruka dipped another finger in the dough, getting a small glob of it on the end of his finger. He held it up, before Kakashi's face and closed his eyes. "Try it. You'll see."

Watching Iruka's face, Kakashi lowered his mask to tentatively taste the batter. It was… good. He tried a second taste, larger than the first. _Very good. _Before he knew it, he had licked the tanned finger clean.

Iruka took a shuddering breath as Kakashi released his finger. "Don't get me started, Kakashi-san…" He whispered huskily. "We'll never get the cookies done if you do."

Kakashi tugged up his mask, staring at the blatant proof of what his brief action had done to Iruka. Without opening his eyes, Iruka took a deep breath and turned to rest his hands on the sink. After several more deep breaths in the effort to control himself, he turned back to Kakashi with a bright smile. "Let's bake."

Iruka instructed Kakashi on how to drop spoonfuls of the dough onto a baking sheet and put them into the oven. He set the timer as he began to make a bowl of icing for the sugar cookies that would go in next. Iruka began telling Kakashi stories of the tricks his students would get up to trying to sneak cookies until they were both laughing and relaxed again.

Five batches of cookies and many snitched bits of dough later, Iruka was frosting several snowman shaped cookies with white frosting as Kakashi spread green on Christmas tree shapes. Iruka handed him a jar of multicolored sprinkles as he added chocolate chips for eyes and buttons on his snowmen. Iruka wiped his face with the back of one hand, accidentally leaving a streak of the white icing across the scar on his nose. Kakashi found it very distracting; that streak of white across tanned features.

For a very long moment he stared at it, completely missing whatever Iruka was saying. Finally he rose and stepped in close to the chuunin. Iruka turned an appealing shade of red and took a step back until he was flush against the counter. "Kakashi-san…?" For the first time his voice was a little uncertain.

Kakashi took the towel that Iruka had been wiping his hands on and tied it over Iruka's eyes. Iruka stiffened and reached for it but Kakashi stayed his hand. "You didn't want to unwrap your gift early…" Kakashi muttered. Iruka went still, his hands dropping away from the cloth that blinded him.

Kakshi tugged down his mask and leaned in to swipe this tongue across the icing decorating that scarred nose. "Sweet…" He murmured.

Iruka shuddered against him. Kakashi pressed closer, lapping up the last of the icing. "Do you taste as sweet?"

Iruka opened his mouth to reply, but Kakashi captured his lips with his own, accepting the invitation to entwine his tongue with Iruka's.

Iruka moaned softly and leaned forward, to press against Kakashi. His hands came up to clutch at the back of Kakashi's head and drag him deeper into the kiss. Kakashi pulled the lean body against him, feeling Iruka's growing interest pressed firmly against his thigh.

The front door banged open and a familiar, obnoxious voice shouted, "Oi, Iruka sensei!"


	20. Did You Hear What I Heard?

I _hated_ writing this chapter, because writing Naruto is DAMNED hard for me! It took me forever to get through writing this one! So please let me know if I fouled him up, okay?

* * *

Title: Did You Hear What I Heard?  
Prompt: Unexpected Guests/Family  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG-13

* * *

Iruka stepped back from Kakashi, and tugged the towel from his flushed face. "In the kitchen, Naruto."

Kakashi turned to face the doorway, his mask already back in place as Naruto burst into the kitchen, an orange whirlwind of irrepressible energy. "Sasuke-teme is coming for Christmas, Iruka-sensei! I beat him! Ooh, do I smell cookies?"

Iruka raised both hands. "Whoa, Naruto. Slow down. Yes, there are cookies and you can have some if you calm down and explain what you mean. What do you mean, you beat him?"

Naruto flopped down on a stool, panting and exhilarated. His boyish grin seemed to take up half his face as Iruka moved to pour a glass of milk and move several still-warm cookies from the cooling rack and onto a plate that he set in front of the boy. Kakashi remained quietly in the background.

"Sasuke-bastard didn't want to come for Christmas, even when I gave him the card you wrote for him." Naruto explained, shoving a whole frosted cookie into his mouth. "He was bein' a real asshole about it too."

"Naruto, watch your mouth."

"Well, he was." Naruto protested. "He said that he didn't need anyone, that there was no reason to celebrate the holiday 'cause he doesn't have any family left."

Iruka's brown eyes saddened. "Family is what you make of it. Sasuke doesn't have to be alone. You and I aren't related, but we're still family."

"That's what I told him!" Naruto flushed slightly at Iruka's admonishing gaze. "Well, sorta. I said that he was stupid cause he could have family if he didn't have to be such an emotionless, obnoxious jerkwad all the time."

"The sentiment is right, but I think you could have found a better way of putting it, Naruto." Kakashi put in.

"Kakashi-sensei? What're you doin' here?"

"You need a lot more training if you didn't even notice my presence. I'm disappointed."

Iruka popped another cookie in Naruto's mouth to quell another outburst. "Kakashi-sensei is alone too. I invited him to share the holidays with us. Is that alright with you?"

Naruto looked thoughtful for a moment before swallowing and nodding. "Like you said, Family's what you make of it. Since you don't got one, Kakashi-sensei, you can share with us!"

Kakashi just nodded as Iruka sighed and folded his arms. "Now, what's this about you beating him?"

Naruto's lips curved up in a blinding grin. "Well, me and him were training and I told him that if I beat him, he had to come for Christmas. Gai-sensei was there and he told me to make it some sort of 'youthful challenge' or something. So we had to beat each other in a game of 'Traps.' I won, cause I'm way better than Sasuke-teme with traps."

Kakashi chuckled but Iruka frowned again. "I don't know that I would call that a fair competition. You know way too many pranks involving traps."

Naruto's bottom lip stuck out. "Gai-sensei decided on the challenge, not me! It's fair!"

Iruka sighed heavily. "Well, I'm not going to argue with results. No one should be alone during the holidays."

Naruto just grinned. After he had finished off his milk and the cookies, (somehow managing to sneak more off the cooling rack, which Kakashi noted that Iruka pretended _not_ to notice) Iruka packed up a few more in a bag for him and sent him on his way.

He took the plate and glass to the sink, before turning to face Kakashi with a twinkle in his eye. "We should thank Gai-sensei sometimes."

"Eh?"

Iruka smiled and stepped closer, sliding his arms around Kakashi's waist. "He deliberately chose a challenge that Sasuke couldn't beat Naruto at."


	21. Talking in a Winter Wonderland

Title: Talking in a Winter Wonderland  
Prompt: Lights  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG-13

* * *

After Naruto had left, Iruka locked the door and returned to the kitchen, where Kakashi was staring at one of the sugar cookies like it might tell him the secrets of the universe.

Iruka sighed and stepped up behind the man, slipping his arms around his waist to pluck the cookie from his grasp. "I smell smoke. What's got you thinking so hard?"

"I was going to eat that." Kakashi grumbled.

"Before or after you stared a hole in it?" Iruka chided.

Kakashi sighed and turned in his arms but didn't move to share the embrace. His arms remained down at his sides. Iruka felt his chest tighten.

"What is it?"

"Why?"

"Why what?" Iruka stopped and pressed a hand over those masked lips. "No, don't answer that. I don't want you to have doubts. I want you here because I want _you._ I wanted you from the moment I met you. Not that anyone would have realized after the fight we had over the nominations." He tilted his head to stare straight into Kakashi's uncovered eye. "I seldom spoke to you after that. Mostly because I didn't know what to say."

Iruka sighed and released his hold on Kakashi's mouth. "When you were assigned to help me, I saw an opportunity to get what I wanted. I teased you because, frankly, it is so much fun seeing you off-balance like that. I like you as a person, as a ninja, as a friend… and I won't deny the sex was great. I'd like to do it again sometime."

Kakashi looked down into his eyes. Iruka smiled up at him. "Now the question becomes, what about you? What do you want?"

Kakashi sighed and held still for so long that Iruka started to get nervous. He would hate it if Kakashi rejected him. He might not be broken by it, but he'd still be hurt.

"I don't know." Kakashi said at last. Iruka swallowed and moved to step back, but Kakashi's arms rose to hold him in place. "I don't know, but I like this. I liked waking up with you this morning. I like your teasing and even those shirts you seem to have in my size for no reason." He lowered his head to press masked lips to Iruka's jaw. The chuunin shivered at the brush of fabric and hot breath. "I liked the sex too, and I'm holding you to your word."

Iruka shuddered and forced himself to focus on matters at hand and not the feel of those fabric covered teeth nibbling a slow line down his neck. "W-what word?"

A dark chuckle rumbled through the chest pressed against his. Kakashi interspersed his words with stinging little nips. "Just… who… gets… to… be… on… top… next."

Iruka sighed and grabbed Kakashi's head to hold him still. He caught that cloth-covered bottom lip between his teeth and growled softly. "If you don't stop that, I'll take you up on that right here and now."

Kakashi growled low in his throat and slipped his hands up under Iruka's shirt. "I'm not arguing."

Iruka deftly twisted out of his grasp. "But I am."

He leaned back against the counter, breathless and flushed with arousal. "The next time we have sex, it will be without masks and so slow, long and hard that I can't fucking walk come the morning."

Kakashi reached for his mask but Iruka stopped him again. "Not here. Help me put most of these cookies away and then we'll take the rest out into the living room and eat them in front of the fire." Iruka smiled heatedly. "And we'll see where things go from there."

Kakashi obediently put cookies in the jar as Iruka made cups of hot chocolate and set them on a tray with a plate of cookies. He carried it into the living room while Kakashi finished up.

When Kakashi emerged from the kitchen a few moments later, Iruka had moved his low table and set a futon and a pile of pillows on the floor in front of the fireplace. The lights were out, only the multicolored lights on the tree twinkling and glittering on the skin of Iruka's now bared chest.

Kakashi sat beside him, folding his legs and accepting the cup of cocoa Iruka handed him. He met Iruka's eyes and tugged down his mask to take a sip.

* * *

A/N: Do I even have to leave a warning about the next chapter?


	22. Not a Silent Night

WARNING: This Chapter of the story is rated NC-17. Lots of sex and not much else. Again, warnings apply. Please remove all electronic or easily damaged items from the area heretofore known as the "Drool Zone." Please have tissues and mops standing by. Blood transfusion equipment would not be considered amiss either. Please remove the elderly and small children to a safe distance as squee's of delight may damage delicate hearing. Thank you for your consideration. Please return all seats and tray tables to the upright positions and thank you for reading with KakaIru Comm.

* * *

Title: Not a Silent Night  
Prompt: Silent Night  
Author: Kita  
Rating: NC-17

* * *

Kakashi waited for Iruka's reaction, feeling his heart throb painfully. He'd had many reactions to his bared face over the years, from fear and revulsion to lust.

Calloused fingers brushed his cheek, sliding down to trace thin lips. Then down to glide over a sensitive white line of scar tissue where an enemy had once made a determined effort to slit his throat. He had to fight not to move as those fingertips ghosted over the sensitized flesh. Then, lips followed those curious fingers and he tipped his head back with a groan.

"Why hide this behind a mask?" Each word was a puff of warm breath against his skin and he couldn't stop a shiver.

"Too many people saw the face of the dead in the face of a boy. It was too much to deal with so I took to wearing a mask." Kakashi breathed, distracted by the warm fingers that had slipped under his shirt to tease his nipples.

Iruka hummed softly against his throat. "I see a warrior and a teacher and most of all, just the face of a man I want."

Kakashi sighed and tipped his head down to seal his lips with Iruka's. The chuunin tasted of chocolate and sugar and the flavor was addictive.

Iruka pressed forward, breathing hard into the kiss. "Need you. I've been way too fucking patient. Want you now." His teeth fastened on Kakashi's lower lip and worried it almost hard enough to draw blood.

Kakashi chuckled low in his throat. "Whatever happened to 'long, slow and hard,' Sensei?"

Iruka did draw a bead of blood that time, but his tongue was swift to soothe the hurt and lave away the crimson droplet. "Don't call me sensei in that tone of voice. I want to hear you saying my name when we're in bed together." He nipped his lip again, softer this time. "I want the hard now. We'll get to the slow part when the edge is off. Right now, I want you so damned bad I can't even see straight."

Kakashi purred as one of those wandering hands slipped lower and traced the waistband of his pants. "All you had to do was ask, Sensei."

That earned him a hard bite on the ear. "Don't call me that. I don't want to get a hard-on every time a student calls me sensei."

"R-right…" Kakashi lost the power of speech as those firm fingers slid inside his pants and wrapped around his swelling erection. "Nnngh…"

Iruka's brown eyes sparkled. "And I think long is right here." He teased, stroking Kakashi's cock firmly. "And I want it now."

"Dammit…" Kakashi couldn't get out of his clothes fast enough. Iruka calmly skinned out of his pants and helped his flustered lover get free of his. Kakashi felt a cold tube of lube shoved in his fingers and Iruka pushed his hand down.

"Now…" He whispered huskily. "I'm all out patience."

Kakashi found he was all out of patience too and hurriedly slicked his fingers. Iruka leaned back against the cushions, lifting his leg over Kakashi's shoulder to provide him with easier access. Kakashi's cock swelled almost painfully at the sight of all that tanned skin spread out invitingly beneath him. He stroked the dusky cock as he slipped an exploratory finger into Iruka. The chuunin gasped and threw his head back, pushing himself further onto that finger. He groaned low in his throat, that sound making Kakashi's groin throb with the desire to be buried in that lean body.

Kakshi added a second finger, feeling for the spot that would make Iruka see stars. He remembered how good it had felt when Iruka had found his and he wanted Iruka to feel the same way. He knew he'd found it when Iruka yowled like a cat. "Oh, hell, do that again!"

He did and watched as Iruka thrashed, his brown hair fanning out on the pillows. Iruka shot his hands out and caught his forearms. "Enough. I won't break! Get your ass into gear."

Kakashi gratefully took the invitation for what it was, slicking his own throbbing cock and positioning it at the inviting entrance. He took a steadying breath as the head slipped inside, the warm pulsating heat almost enough to make him lose it. Iruka cried out softly and arched up as he slid in until his balls rested against Iruka's ass. Gritting his teeth, Kakashi held himself still as the grip around his aching cock eased. Iruka grunted and wrapped the leg not on Kakashi's shoulder around the older ninja's waist. "Move. Pound me through the floor before I go mad."

Kakashi could only obey, slipping out of the grasping confines of Iruka's ass only to thrust back in harshly. Iruka growled and slammed his head back against the cushions, his clawing fingers leaving scores on Kakashi's skin. He wasn't quiet in bed, alternately growling, moaning and cursing. "Yessss, harder…"

Kakashi arched his back and thrust in deep. Iruka's eyes rolled back and his fingers scrabbled for a grip. "Ooohhhh…!"

Kakashi stilled for a moment, fighting the urge to thrust unto the willing body below him until he exploded. He was so close, but Iruka was closer, sweating and moaning; muscles clenching around the cock that impaled him. A low whine escaped Iruka's throat as he stopped moving. "Oh, crap, move, damn you!" he snarled, pushing his hips up for more of the friction that was denied him.

Kakashi stilled him, one hand pinching his erection just hard enough to hold back the orgasm. Iruka's fingers dug unto his skin hard enough to leave bruises. "Damn you, move!" He wailed.

Kakashi smirked and moved just enough to keep Iruka teetering on the edge of madness. "I…oh, hell," he grunted. "I have a question. And I'll be too happy to stay r-right fucking here until I g-get an answer."

Iruka's eyes were glazed in a flushed face and he snapped, teeth flashing in the dim light. _"What?"_

"What's the d-deal with all the masked shirts?" Kakashi gritted out, rotating his hips just a little to keep Iruka balanced on that razor's edge.

Iruka blinked and stared at him, before a slow smile curled up his lips. "That's all?" He growled and tugged Kakashi down until his lips were brushing his ear. "You have me like this and all you can think to ask about are those damned shirts? Fine…" He began to whisper, his breath hot and sending shivers down Kakashi's spine. He punctuated the last word with a sharp bite to Kakashi's earlobe that had the jounin snapping his hips forward, his hand losing his grip on Iruka's cock.

Iruka flung his head back with a keening cry, coming hard between them. The rhythmic pulsing of his muscles around Kakashi pulled him over the edge too and he came inside Iruka's body, the last contractions of the chuunin's orgasm milking him dry. His arms gave out and he slumped down on the tanned chest below him.

When he could manage to get his breath back, he regarded Iruka with a single gray eye, heavy-lidded with satiation. "Are you kidding me?" He husked, still winded.

Iruka smirked and lapped at his abused earlobe, sending fresh blood surging through his groin. "What, you were expecting some sort of deep, dark secret? Now, Kakashi, I seem to remember something about me not being able to walk come the morning. You've got some more work to do if we're going to get those results." He tugged Kakashi's head down for another bruising kiss. "A lot more work." He purred.


	23. Mornings We Have Felt on Highs

Title: Mornings We Have Felt on Highs  
Prompt: Velvet  
Author: Kita  
Rating: R

* * *

Iruka woke slowly and blinked at the lights of the tree twinkling in the dim light of pre-dawn. Why was he—? He felt the burn of abused muscles and a pleased, sated grin grew on his face. _Oh, right._

There was a warm arm draped over his waist, but Kakashi showed no signs of stirring. Iruka hid a smirk at the sight of the great copy-nin laid bare, his pale face half-buried in a pillow and those sinful lips parted slightly. He was drooling slightly.

In a gross way it was… kind of cute.

Iruka slipped out from under the arm and stood, stretching languorously. He winced as his spine popped and his decidedly well-pounded ass protested. He hurt, but it was a good ache. He smirked. It was the ache of the _very_ well fucked. Moving deliberately, he limped to the bathroom, snagging a couple of towels along the way.

He made no effort to hide the sounds of his movement, because that would wake Kakashi up more surely than anything. If he tried to be quiet, the nin's sleeping mind would interpret that as a threat and he'd come up fighting. But the quiet sounds of someone who was making no effort to hide their presence would not cause those honed instincts to trigger. _Besides,_ it would be fun to wake Kakashi up…

He winced as an injudicious step reminded him just how much he hurt. … After he'd warmed up and loosened up in the shower, _then_ he'd enjoy waking Kakashi.

Iruka paused inside the bathroom to study his reflection. There were bruises on the slope of his hipbones and red marks ringing his throat. He fingered a perfect bite mark right where his neck joined his shoulder, pleased with the tender, warm feel of the abused flesh. Smiling, he turned on the water as hot as he could bear it and stood beneath the pounding spray long enough to loosen his muscles.

He cleaned up and treated himself for some of the more painful marks he'd garnered last night. Not that he regretted a single one of them. Not one…

Still smiling, he slipped on a pair of boxers and gingerly padded back out to the living room. Kakashi had rolled over into the warm spot he had left behind. His chakra patterns indicated he was close to waking. Iruka smiled at him and bent to tug the heavy velvet blanket up over one pale shoulder. He had left his mark too, in red scratches on that pale flesh and a purpling love-bite on the column of his throat. But with his mask, his would be nowhere as visible as Iruka's. The chuunin would have to wear a turtleneck tomorrow when the kids came over. He intended to have them sleep over and wake up here on Christmas morning.

He moved slowly as he prepared breakfast for them, favoring his abused muscles. He felt Kakashi drift closer to waking and moved things off the heat to pad back out into the living room. He bent and dropped a kiss on Kakashi's temple, smiling as both eyes drifted open, the sharingan spinning slowly before Kakashi realized and shut it. Iruka handed him the strip of black silk he had used before. "Go ahead and grab a shower. I'll have breakfast ready soon."

Kakashi nodded and padded off to the bathroom.

Iruka was nearly done with the cooking when warm, slightly damp arms slid around his waist and a voice breathed in his ear. "Looks like I need more practice."

"Mmm?"

"You're up and walking around." Kakashi murmured against his neck. "I must not have done my job right."


	24. Chistmas is Coming Soon

Title: Christmas is Coming... Soon  
Prompt: Family  
Title: Kita  
Rating: PG-13

* * *

It was nearly one when they managed to drag themselves out of the blankets and stumble into the shower (together, but there wasn't more than the occasional wandering hand). Iruka decided there was a difference between deliciously sore and _'I let my libido get the better of me,'_ but he wouldn't have traded last night (and this morning) for anything.

Kakashi surprised him pleasantly by gently and carefully helping him clean up. Iruka simply leaned against the cool tile and let the other man help him bathe. "Mmm…" He murmured. "You definitely deserve a reward for this… later."

Kakashi chuckled against his neck and turned off the water. "You have a couple of hellions coming over later. Don't you think it's time we got dressed?"

Iruka grinned. "Ah, but you underestimate the shock value of being in the buff when Naruto comes around. I've actually managed to get him to shut up for an entire hour that way."

Kakashi laughed as Iruka oh-so-slowly worked a few of the worst kinks out. "Mmm," He groaned as he stretched his back. "Of course, it might actually surprise Sasuke into making a sound. Do you think he would snort or gasp? Or just go hnn?"

Kakashi stole a quick kiss. "Depends on whether I molest you in front of him or not."

Iruka chuckled. "Kakashi!"

"Might even get a squeak out of him."

Iruka eyed him seriously for a moment. "So you're okay with it? Letting them know about—?"

"Us being lovers?" Kakashi shook his head. "There's nothing to hide. They know Genma and Raidou have been a couple for a year now. Why should we hide it?"

Iruka smiled and stepped close enough to kiss him. "Thank you."

He grabbed comfortable sweats for himself and a pair of sweatpants and another of the masked shirts for Kakashi. Kakashi took it, looked at it and raised an eyebrow at him. They both started laughing at the same time.

"Your own fault." Iruka reminded him.

Kakshi impishly stuck his tongue out. Iruka merely laughed and bent to tug his sweats on. Kakashi caught his pained wince and stepped closer. "Hold still."

Iruka paused and whimpered softly as strong hands smoothed down his back, feeling out the worst of his hurts. Iruka gasped softly and mewled as the barest thread of chakra tingled over his back, leaving relief in its wake. "_Oh, where_ did you learn to do _that…?"_

He heard amusement in Kakashi's voice. "In ANBU. You had to learn how to mend yourself. It comes in handy sometimes. I can't heal a major wound, but I can stem bleeding and ease pain enough to complete a mission."

Iruka made a sound remarkably like a purr. "You have until the fifth of never to stop doing that."

Kakashi chuckled. "Alas, I cannot, for what does mine ear detect but the pitter-patter of little feet… oh, and the sound of Naruto's loud mouth."

Iruka shot him an amused glare. "Then you get to answer the door, but put your mask on first, or they'll be too interested in your face for us to see what kind of sound we can get out of Sasuke."

Kakashi grinned at him and stole a swift kiss before tugging the shirt on and making sure the mask was in place. He opened the door before either of the arguing teens could knock. "Coming in, boys, or do you plan to stand out there until you freeze?"

Sasuke shot him a startled glare but swiftly adopted his emotionless face. "Hnn." He grumbled. "We won't freeze, not with the sheer amount of hot air the dobe here puts out."

"Kakashi-sensei, what are you doing here this early?" Naruto asked.

"Ran into a dolphin on the road of life that made me an offer I couldn't refuse. So here I am."

Iruka, listening at the bedroom door, laughed and checked his reflection in the mirror. He had pulled the sweats up enough to hide the hand-shaped bruises on his hips, but there was no hiding the ring of hickeys nor the perfect love-bite on his shoulder. He smiled mischievously and tugged his hair up into its usual high tail, to more clearly show the marks.

He strolled out to greet the two boys, pleased to note that he could actually move easily, thanks to Kakashi. "Hello, Sasuke; Naruto."

Naruto dropped that bag of presents he was carrying and gawped silently. Sasuke made a sound like a strangled squeak.

Kakashi chuckled and slid an arm around Iruka's waist. " Told you so."


	25. I'm Home For Christmas

Title: I'm Home for Christmas  
Prompt: Gift Exchange  
Author: Kita  
Rating: PG

* * *

Remind me not to try this again... (cradles abused fingers)

* * *

Iruka sighed and leaned against Kakashi, tired and happy. The boys had finally fallen asleep, sprawled on the futon in front of the small fire. "I'm glad they took it so well."

Kakashi chuckled warmly. "If you call Naruto having a twenty minute spaz in which he couldn't speak a sensible word and Sasuke looking like he had swallowed a live fish taking it well, then yes."

Iruka smiled. "It could have been worse and you know it."

"I know."

Iruka nuzzled Kakashi's shoulder. "I can't remember when I've had this good a holiday. Not since my parents died."

Kakashi sighed. "I can't remember a holiday I've ever enjoyed."

He felt Iruka smile against his skin. "We'll have to make sure you enjoy them from now on."

"Now that I have a reason to."

The smile Iruka gave him was dazzling.

They sat there for a while longer, simply enjoying each other's presence and their rather unorthodox family. Finally Iruka rose and pulled out the bag of stocking stuffers. He took down the stockings and sat back on the couch. "Here. You put the candy in each of them while I sort the rest of the stocking stuffers out."

They sat in companionable silence, filling the four stockings and then Iruka rose to hang them back up. He held out his hand to Kakashi. "Shall we go to bed? I have a feeling that they'll both be up as soon as the sun is."

Kakashi took his hand.

Iruka's prediction proved true. Naruto bounded into the room before the sky had even fully brightened with dawn. He sprang onto the bed and bounced. Iruka had to restrain Kakashi from throwing a kunai at him. "We're up. You and Sasuke can get the stockings down while we come out. We'll be there in just a moment."

Kakashi grumbled as the irrepressible ball of energy that was Naruto launched himself back out into the living room. Iruka just chuckled at him and tugged his mask down for a quick brush of lips. "We'd better get up before the two of them destroy everything in impatience."

"Sasuke?" Kakashi's voice was full of disbelief.

Iruka smiled and tugged him toward the door. "Look." He opened the door a bare crack. Sasuke was sitting cross-legged on the futon, with his stocking in his lap. To the untrained eye, it looked like he was waiting patiently, but Kakashi could see the tension in his frame and the slight way his foot jittered. Iruka's voice was warm against his neck. "He hides it well, but he's still enough of a child to be impatient."

Kakashi nodded and let Iruka herd him out into the living room.

"_Finally!"_ Naruto sprang up from where he had been cradling his own stocking. "Hurry up, Iruka-sensei; Kakashi-sensei!"

Iruka let Naruto tug them to the couch, where their own stockings had been placed. When they were settled, he all but dived after his own. Iruka smiled at Sasuke. "Go ahead."

For a moment, Sasuke looked like a child again, not the mini-avenger he was; gleefully pulling things out of the red felt stocking. His eyes lit up at the candy and he was the first to pop a chocolate into his mouth. Iruka picked up a wrapped parcel that had been stuffed haphazardly into the top of his stocking and saw Naruto's eyes light up. Schooling his face, he ripped the wrapping paper off of it. It was a horrible thing of blue glaze and green, a misshapen lump he supposed was intended to be a dolphin. It looked nothing like the sea-creature; resembling nothing so much as a kiln accident.

"Thank you," He told Naruto with a smile that didn't look _too_ forced. He wasn't going to lose this year.

Naruto frowned and went back to investigating his stocking. When he had opened two smaller packages, he pulled out the fateful gift. His face wrinkled into a dismayed frown as he ripped off the paper and opened the box. "Wha…?"

Iruka chuckled as Naruto held up the ghastly purple and orange and lemon-yellow figure of a demented looking frog holding a fishing pole. "My win. That mean he goes on your bookshelves for the world to see."

"Iruka-sensei…" Naruto grumped, but set the statue down carefully next to the fireplace.

After they had opened everything in their stockings, Naruto all but dived under the tree to hand out gifts. "Me. Iruka-sensei. Kakashi-sensei. Iruka-sensei. Sasuke-teme. Me…"

When all the gifts had been handed out, wrapping paper flew. Kakashi noted with satisfaction that Sasuke's eyes had softened as he had opened the book and ran gentle fingers over the lush watercolor illustrations inside. Naruto had exclaimed loudly over his ramen bowl and the set of coupons for Ichiraku's that Iruka had given him as well. Iruka's smile as he opened his paperweight was all that Kakashi could have asked for. Iruka leaned over and kissed him firmly through the mask, grinning.

"It goes on my desk as soon as I go back to work." He told Kakashi softly, ignoring the stares of the two teens.

Kakashi opened a box from Iruka to discover a signed poster from the upcoming Icha-Icha movie. It had been signed by the lead actors and Jiraiya. He gave Iruka a look that promised a good molesting later and watched with delight as red bloomed across the scarred nose.

After everything had been opened and exclaimed over, Iruka had corralled Naruto into helping him gather up the wrapping paper, while Kakashi and Sasuke got dressed. When Naruto was dressed too, he sent them out to deliver their gifts to Sakura while he started cooking. By the time they got back, he was mostly done. He handed Naruto a stack of plates and cups and Sasuke a handful of silverware and napkins and set the boys to setting the table. He pulled Kakashi aside and told him to summon the pack.

Kakashi raised an eyebrow. Flushing slightly, Iruka explained. "I've watched how you treat your pack when you didn't think anyone was watching. They're as much a part of your family as your students. Besides, they deserve a treat after what you put them through with my kids."

Chastised, Kakashi bit his thumb and formed the seals to summon his whole pack. When all eight of them appeared, regarding Iruka curiously, the chuunin pointed toward huge bowls of chopped meat. "Merry Christmas."

They looked uncertainly toward Kakashi until he waved them toward the bowls. "What are you waiting for? Written invitations?"

Iruka went down with a squeak to rival Sasuke's as he was mobbed by the pack. When he had been personally slobbered on by each and every one of the ninken, Kakashi tugged him back to his feet and wrapped his arms tightly around his waist. "Guess it's official now."

Still wiping his face, Iruka shot him a curious glance. "Mmm?"

Kakashi smiled and pressed a kiss to the nape of Iruka's neck. "You're pack now. You're never getting rid of us now."


End file.
